How To Be A High-Quality Woman Who Gets The Relationship She Wants

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The methods that I have developed have reunited quite a few women with their exes. Here's one sharing in my private support group by Kristie:

"I got my man back. He has all of the sudden gotten very serious. Moving back in, wanting to get married and buy a house together, etc. I am letting him move back in but holding off on the rest for now. But now that he's back, and living with me, how do I keep it fresh? And make sure it will work before I commit to the rest? This is our second go-round living together. Don't want to make the same mistakes, and I know so much more after reading Kat's material. I want to keep our relationship fresh and exciting. We both work 12-hour days, and I have 3 kids at home, so it's so easy to quickly get in a rut.

We never really went without contact, a week or two at the most. The longest we went without seeing each other was a month or so I think but we were always in touch with each other just not daily or at regular intervals like before. We got back together about 10 months ago, only after I started dating someone else and refused to see him at all for a while, but we still talked. It was very up and down and we broke it off again at the end of January.

I began reading her material, putting it into practice when possible, and trust me I was doing EVERYTHING wrong. We never really stopped talking or seeing each other at least now and then after the 2nd breakup. I told him that I was dating others one night during a conversation and he seemed cool with it. But he has latched onto me since. I have had my reservations about his motives of course. But just thoroughly enjoying the attention from him. We went to a work function of his last night and several of his co-workers told me he told them he was a changed man and was going to marry me.

It is very hard to put into practice things that you learn, it's just natural to go back to instinctual behaviors when upset, but I was horrible to this man, I turned him into a frog! I really did.  And these tendencies still surface, I am very insecure, I can see it in all areas of my life actually. I'm afraid the old me will surface and push him away again. But I have come a long way.  I will keep reading and learning and working on building my own confidence. Kat’s material is amazing, and spot on.  It is almost an instant change in their behaviors when you put it into full practice. I won't stop learning and growing with or without this man!!"

UPDATE:  Kristie is now happily married 6 months after the reconciliation.

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Kirstie's story is far too uncommon. Women push men away with their pushy, controlling, and needy behaviors are driven by their insecurities and expectations — then call them emotionally unavailable. 

Relationship issues mainly stem from relationship issues we have with ourselves.  When we come into a relationship expecting our partner to fill a void in us, the likelihood is that relationship will crumble before too long.  

To get your relationship back on track, first and foremost you need to get yourself back. Get back to that old self of yours that made him fall in love with you in the first place before Debbie Downer took over.

The principle I teach is to make every relationship you have your training ground. As an avenue for personal growth.  Use past relationships as a catalyst to your healing for every issue that holds you back.

You can't do it alone, or at the very least the process will be much faster when you have someone holding a mirror in your face so you can see all the flaws and ugliness you put out yourself. Once you see them and bring them to light, you can start working on them. 

What guy doesn't love the ever-positive energy she projects to the world? What guy can shun such a powerful feminine presence and radiance?  What guy can resist a seductive woman whose only power is her feminine presence? 

Debbie Downer focuses on lack and what she doesn't have. A high-value woman focuses on the abundance and bountifulness of her life and what she does have. What you focus on expands.  Focus on lack and you will see crumbs and be brought down by resentment and self-pity. Focus on the gratitude for what you have and you will inspire love, adoration — and commitment — from the man you love.

Make him feel great around you at all times by bringing out your best self, there is no reason for him not to want to have you for the rest of his life. Do the exact opposite, he'll run faster than a scared deer. It's as simple as that.  

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Don't worry about finding the right man. Be the right woman, the rest will take care of itself.  Once you become high-value, you won't stay single for very long. Every guy who finds you attractive will want to be with you. This is exactly why my method works and I have proven it myself with the healthy relationship I am in. My boyfriend claimed me even before I was ready because he just couldn't wait. 

It works because it's not about manipulation and it's not about hunting for a relationship or a partner. Finding a partner is just the amazing "side effect" of being fabulous and desirable. It's about personal growth first and foremost. It's about making yourself the best, sanest, feminine woman a man can have.

My method is process oriented which is feminine-energy based, instead of goal-oriented which is masculine-energy based. 

I don't teach how to seek commitment. I teach how to let yourself be claimed by a worthy man by being a high-value woman.  The stance of seeking commitment rarely works because her energy collides with his.  

A high-value woman is never short of options because she is sought after.

She in fact doesn't rush commitment because she observes and stays in the moment to not get ahead of him. So no, she is never stuck. By definition, being stuck is not in the traits of a high-quality woman. She sees things as they are. She doesn't fall for an idea of a man which many women do, hence the demand for commitment long before they know these guys.

A high-value woman can walk away from a guy knowing a hundred others would love to have her affection, and he knows this fact very well. There is no ounce of neediness or unrequited love in her. She doesn't need to convince him. In fact, he'll need to convince her not to walk away.

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A lot of things in your love life will change dramatically if you have this notion in your mind, ladies.

When you have been the best you can be and you have done all the right things, you always know what to do next because you're never running out of options.

You don't have to throw ultimatums, pledges, or convince a man to commit to you ever again because the realization that he can lose you anytime thanks to your high desirability factor will send a shiver down his spine. By being the best you can be, you naturally won't tolerate crummy behaviors.  

He knows that you can walk away anytime when it becomes necessary. You don't need to nag to be heard. Both of you know, though he leads, you are the actual Queen. You will be so secure that you won't have a problem walking away knowing that it's his loss. Once he loses you, he will have sleepless nights thinking that he may never find a woman like this ever again!!

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Katarina Phang is a dating/relationship coach and Feminine Magnetism expert par extraordinaire who has worked and helped thousands of women from all corners of the world transform their relationships.