Kids Who Were Never Told No Growing Up Usually Do These 11 Entitled Things As Adults
ShotPrime Studio / Shutterstock When kids grow up without hearing the word “no,” it can feel loving in the moment. But psychology suggests that never saying no to your children often creates long-term problems. Boundaries are how children learn to tolerate frustration, take accountability, and respect others. Without them, many never develop the emotional skills needed to navigate adulthood gracefully. Instead of resilience, they’re left with a sense that the world should bend to their needs.
As adults, these patterns may show up in more subtle, socially disruptive ways. Entitlement often looks like defensiveness, impatience, or chronic dissatisfaction rather than outright arrogance. What’s tricky is that these behaviors are easy to excuse as personality quirks, even when they repeatedly strain relationships.
Kids who were never told no growing up usually do these 11 entitled things as adults
1. They have poor self-control
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Kids who were never told no growing up usually have poor self-control as adults. They were always given a golden spoon since they were little. With the best money could buy, these kids never wanted for anything. From demanding the best clothes to taking the most luxurious vacations, they never learned what it meant to have good boundaries or not get what they wanted.
This is probably why they have poor self-control. As licensed clinical social worker Robert Taibbi, L.C.S.W., said, "Spoiled, entitled children can grow up to be self-centered, volatile adults who struggle in relationships." So, it's no surprise they have such poor self-control. Self-centered and spoiled, they believe they deserve everything this world has to offer when it works to their advantage.
2. They take criticism personally
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Let's face it, nobody likes criticism. It doesn't matter how tough someone is. Even the strongest people out there aren't immune to the sting of harsh words. Still, there's no denying that criticism is just one of those things that's part of daily life. No matter how difficult it may be, constructive criticism often leads to positive change, which most of us can come to appreciate.
That being said, kids who were never told no growing up usually take criticism personally as adults. While normal people may get slightly offended, entitled people take it too far. Huffing and puffing, they'll fake outrage while demanding an apology. It's spoiled behavior, but they can't help their upbringing. Because they were never told no growing up, they genuinely don't see anything wrong with stomping their feet, even as an adult.
3. They expect instant gratification
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Most of us want to live life in easy mode. Whether it's at work or at school, reality doesn't match real life. And while the average person grows to be patient and accepting, kids who were never told no growing up usually expect instant gratification as adults. Unlike everyone else, these people think they deserve everything handed to them. Even if they only put in the bare minimum, it doesn't matter.
So long as they exerted their energy, they held out their hands expecting a trophy. However, rewarding people for bare minimum behavior is a horrible idea. This is why it's crucial for parents to only use rewards for good behavior and, most importantly, randomize them. As behavioral psychologist Susan Weinschenk, Ph.D., said, using randomized rewards helps keep good behavior going, while ensuring they don't expect it every time.
4. They have difficulty handling disappointment
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There's little worse than feeling disappointed. Despite it being part of daily life, going through life's hurdles is far from easy. That being said, kids who were never told no growing up usually have difficulty handling disappointment as adults. It sounds strange, but entitled adults never learned to deal with disappointment. So used to getting everything they've ever wanted, the thought of them suddenly being cut off is jarring.
This is why they're quick to throw a temper tantrum. While many might call them childish for doing so, in their eyes, the thought of them not 'winning' is unfathomable and simply too unfair to handle.
5. They blame others for their mistakes
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To be fair, nobody wants to be blamed for anything. While making mistakes is simply a part of daily life, owning up to them can be a lot harder. As licensed psychologist Mike Brooks, Ph.D., explained, "Just as we have fight, flight, or freeze instincts to protect our physical well-being, we defend our psychological sense of self when our various identities are threatened."
Still, many of us push aside our instincts for the sake of doing what's right. Whether that means apologizing or making amends, the average person does their best to level the field. That being said, kids who were never told no growing up usually blame others for their mistakes. Having been created with such a high ego, these individuals don't know how to admit their own shortcomings. Blame it on their parents' inability to check them, but as adults, they now use blame to protect their own ego.
6. They expect special treatment
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If there's one thing an entitled child's parents did right, it was making them feel special. From awesome birthday parties to amazing Christmas presents, these parents went all out for their children. However, without proper boundaries, kids who were never told no growing up usually expect special treatment as adults. In reality, most of us expect to be treated equally. From work to school, we don't expect favoritism.
Yet, children who've always been treated specially may view equal treatment as oppression. This is why they throw temper tantrums and why they get irrationally angry. While the average person views their treatment as fair, they can't comprehend not being special in everyone's eyes.
7. They struggle in the workplace
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Most people struggle at some point in their work life. Whether it's just being hired or switching positions, it's normal to need a slight adjustment period. That being said, entitled people always struggle. It doesn't matter how much time passes or the training they get. Used to their freedom and living life on easy mode, kids who were never told no growing up usually struggle in the workplace.
From turning in assignments to working in a group setting, these individuals make every step of the way difficult for their employees. However, this isn't surprising, as a study published in Pediatrics states that "spoiled child syndrome is characterized by excessive self-centered and immature behavior." So, if they're constantly mouthing off or being lazy, look at the parents. Nine times out of ten, they let their child do whatever they wanted to.
8. They have fragile self-esteem
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It shouldn't come as a surprise that entitled kids turned adults have fragile self-esteem. Being coddled as a child, they don't know how to handle inconvenience. This is why kids who were never told no growing up usually have fragile self-esteem in the first place.
Parents may love their kids, but at some point, they need to learn to put their foot down and tell their kid the truth. The world doesn't revolve around their children. Kids need to develop thicker skin if they want to learn to adapt to the real world. This is why it's crucial not to over-coddle children, as it can turn them into entitled adults.
9. They dominate conversations
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Most people learn at a young age to let other people speak. Considered rude and disrespectful if they don't, the average person learns to wait their turn or raise their hand if they have something to say. However, kids who were never told no growing up usually dominate conversations as adults. Sure, it isn't the most fun to be interrupted, but many of us let it slide because, most of the time, it's a genuine mistake.
Yet, those who grew up spoiled can't help but dominate every conversation they're in. From work meetings to family gatherings, they need to be the center of attention. And while they might think their behavior is okay, they should be careful. According to a study published in the Journal of Experimental Social Psychology, being disrespectful leads to more aggression than being disliked.
10. They struggle with compromise in relationships
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Most people don't love having to compromise, no matter how much they adore their partner. They might also secretly hate having to go through another round of negotiations. However, this is what most of us do when we love someone. Even if it isn't enjoyable, we know that compromise is the only way to make a relationship work.
On the flip side, kids who were never told no growing up usually struggle with compromise in relationships as adults. So used to being the center of attention, they don't know how to grapple with suddenly being not as important in their relationships. Because of this, many entitled adults grow up struggling with their romantic and platonic relationships.
11. They confuse confidence with entitlement
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Finally, kids who were never told no growing up usually confuse confidence with entitlement. Everyone should aspire to be confident. No matter what flaws someone thinks they have, being confident in their own skin or intelligence is crucial to living a happy life. According to a study published in 2023, people with high self-esteem tend to have better social relationships than the average person.
Still, entitled people often confuse their confidence with entitlement. So used to getting whatever they want, they act like being a 'diva' or 'boss' is just confidence, when it's really just rudeness.
Marielisa Reyes is a writer with a bachelor's degree in psychology who covers self-help, relationships, career, family, and astrology topics.
