11 Ways To Tap Into Your Feminine Energy Before A First Date

Shift into your feminine power before you head out the door.

couple on a date outdoors GaudiLab / shutterstock

Are you connected to your feminine energy? Or are you so focused on getting things done in your life that dating and finding love are just another task on your to-do list?

Perhaps you’re unaware of how important it is to tap into your feminine energy before a first date or first meeting.

As a woman, tapping into your feminine energy before you go out on a date — and throughout the dating process — will speed up your ability to create the soulmate relationship you're looking for.


What is feminine energy?

Feminine energy traits are not passive. If you’ve ever been in a storm, you know this to be true.

It’s not Father Nature — it’s Mother Nature. And this powerful energy that you came into the world with can be channeled to identify an ideal match for long-lasting, soul-satisfying love.

RELATED: How To Balance The Masculine & Feminine Energy In Your Relationship

Here are 11 ways to tap into your feminine energy before a first date.

1. Know the difference between masculine and feminine energy.

Masculine energy is directed, analytical, single-focused, competitive, and goal-driven. Feminine energy is emotional, inclusive, reflective, sensual, and reciprocal.


All humans have access to both masculine and feminine energy. These energetics are on a dial-switch so you can accentuate one by dialing it up or choose to downplay it. 

The dance of intimate relationships flows easily when there's a balance of masculine and feminine energies between the two partners.

Two masculine energies will be too competitive to dance together. Two feminine energies are reciprocal, and no one ends up taking the lead.

Just like two ballroom dancers, the strong masculine energy leads and creates a firm foundation for the feminine energy to emanate and express its creativity.

2. Create a ritual for yourself.

Having rituals is an important tool for grounding yourself and connecting to your feminine energy. Use your sensory experiences to connect to your feelings and body sensations.


Whether it's a song you love, a perfume, a scented candle, or an outfit you feel sexy in, change your energy from getting things done to connect with your senses.

Before going on a first date connect with your sensual side. Your sensuality and your femininity are innately connected. Getting in touch with your senses will allow you to show up authentically and be present for your date.

Tapping into your feminine energy before a first date or first meeting grounds you in the present moment. From this place, you're more receptive and open to making a meaningful connection.

3. Connect to your emotional state.

Your emotional state is your most authentic state. Connecting to your emotions will get you out of an analytical state of mind and into your feminine energy.


Sit down, ground your feet on the floor, close your eyes, and connect to your body.

Emotions are the same as body sensations. Connecting to your body will allow you to become aware of your feelings, which are very different than your thoughts. Complete the phrase, "I feel..." Then allow your emotions to be what they are, without judgment.

Connecting to your emotional life taps into your feminine energy, making you more present and more able to express yourself authentically.

4. Remember that attraction is born out of differences.

Just like magnets are drawn together by polar opposites, you're attracted to someone who is different than you because you’ll each have different strengths and weaknesses. This leverages the likelihood for the family unit to survive.


By tapping into your feminine energy in dating, you will evaluate the person you’re meeting from a different point of view.

Instead of looking for someone who's like you, you’ll want to cultivate discernment through the dating process to discover over time if the two of you have shared values.

5. Don’t abdicate your power.

Your feminine energy is powerful because you get to set the tone and the speed of the dating process. Leaning into your receptive energy puts you in a position to decide if your date has won another date with you.

Allowing your date to lead does not mean you have to follow. You have veto power too, and the only way to harness that energy is by standing firmly in your feminine energy.


By tapping into your feminine energy before a first date, you’ll know if someone is interested from the start. You'll waste less time on those who are just looking for some companionship and be able to focus on those who desire a real relationship with you.

6. You’ll never wonder where the relationship is going.

By tapping into your feminine energy before a first meeting you’ll be setting the tone for the dating process right from the start.

Show up connected to your femininity, even if you enjoy being adventurous, working on cars, or leading your business at the office. How you show up to a first meeting or first date will create the setting for connection or disconnection.

The key is to not appear disinterested or aloof in order to give your date some encouragement.


Courtship used to have clear rules of engagement, and even though times have changed, you’ll still want to embrace your feminine energy so that you don’t waste your time on someone who won't commit.

RELATED: How To Harness The Power Of Your Feminine Energy To Manifest True Love

7. Cultivate chemistry and connection instead of competition.

Two feminine energies together are reciprocal while two masculine energies are competitive. Showing up in your masculine energy for a first date or first meeting sets in motion a competitive environment, one where chemistry and attraction cannot survive.

Create a connection by knowing what it is you specifically want a partner to provide for you in a relationship. Then you can quickly identify an ideal match and deselect the ones who can’t be bothered.


Tapping into your feminine energy in dating will allow you to create connection and the spark of chemistry so that a man pursues you for a commitment.

8. Show up instead of showing off.

It's important to show up as your authentic self. Share on a first date what you do and don’t like. Don't iron out any bumps or try to make things easy. A date is not like a job interview — there’s no need to show off your resume or your communication skills.

Tapping into your feminine energy puts you in the seat to control the pace. You can make a conscious choice to see if romance is possible.

The energetics between the two of you will ebb and flow over time in a long-term relationship. It’s important to set things up from the start so you can select an ideal match.


9. End the date after an hour.

Meeting for the first time is like an appetizer — it's just one bite. About an hour is the right amount of time to know if you want to see each other again.

Have somewhere to go, make a plan to depart, and if you want to see them again, let them know you enjoyed yourself.

Tap into your feminine energy by putting the ball back in your date's court if they suggest you reach out next time. If they try to invite you to go to a second location for the meaty part of the date, don't go along to get along. 

Leave them wanting more.


10. Do not iron out the bumps.

Don’t worry if things get off to a bumpy start because every relationship will have some conflict. How the two of you move through those disagreements is an important evaluation through the dating process to know if there is staying power in the relationship.

Tapping into your feminine energy for a first date allows you to share who you are. Speak up about your likes and dislikes. Sometimes you find common ground by first finding out where you’re not in alignment.

11. Remember that you're the prize.

When you tap into your feminine energy before a first date or first meeting, you’ll be standing in your power. Know your worth and value in a relationship. This is not about your appearance or how much you weigh. There's a lid for every pot.

When you know you're the prize, you can relax into your feminine energy and let the man show off and pursue you.


Then you’re in the position of giving him feedback or redirecting him altogether so he knows how to please you.

The man who wants to share his life with you will want to be your hero — let him.

Dating is not like going on a job interview or achieving your life goals.

Make dating more enjoyable by relaxing into the dance of the masculine and feminine and creating the space for your ideal match to show up for you. Access your personal power by tapping into your feminine energy.

You’ll feel more satisfied and less anxious dating someone who's willing and interested in dancing with you.

RELATED: 5 Ways To Enhance Your Feminine Allure (And Drive Him Wild)


Orna and Matthew Walters are Soulmate Coaches who have been featured guest experts on Bravo’s "The Millionaire Matchmaker." They uncover subconscious blocks to love so that you can select an ideal partner to share your life with If you're looking to find your soulmate, download their free report, "7 Steps To Soulmating" from their website.