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These are skills that need to be worked on to maintain a healthy relationship.
By Mitzi Bockmann — Last updated on Feb 15, 2024
I think that most women would say that being in a great relationship is a priority in their life and yet many women struggle with the skills necessary to maintain such a relationship. There are 5 key skills that all women need to master, skills that will allow them to have great and healthy relationships and succeed in other areas of their lives.
Here are 5 little emotional skills women in the best relationships have mastered:
1. Believe in yourself
This is the most basic skill that a woman must possess to be in the best relationship. Because if a woman doesn't have a good relationship with herself, she will never be able to have a good relationship with others. Women who don’t believe in themselves look to others to ‘complete them.’ They aren't confident in their ability to make their way in the world alone and think that without a mate they will never be able to do so.
This lack of self-confidence puts an incredible amount of pressure on a partner, to expect them to carry the one they love. Most people are working hard to carry themselves through life and having to carry another is a burden that is often too much to bear. And the relationship fails. So work hard to believe in yourself. Have your own life and friends and a job that feeds your soul and your self-confidence. Carry your weight in the world and you will be a good partner in a relationship.
2. Be willing and able to communicate
Communication is essential in every relationship. Without it, a relationship is doomed. Being able to talk to your partner about everything — both the good and the bad — is a key skill to have in every good relationship. If you can't tell your partner that you love them or appreciate them, then you won’t be able to reach the closeness that you desire.
And if you can’t tell your partner that they have hurt you or that you are angry with them and, instead, internalize your emotions, then your relationship will fail. So work hard at developing good communication skills. Make an effort to verbalize your feelings, both good and bad. Tell your partner that you love them every day. Make sure that if something is amiss you talk about it before it grows into something big and destructive. You will be glad you did.
3. Have the ability to be alone
Maybe women struggle with being alone. Alone in their home, alone out in the world, alone. A key part of being in a good relationship is the ability to be happy alone. Once again, the need to rely on someone else for your happiness and ease can be very destructive in a relationship. If any time that your partner needs to do something without you, you get clingy and needy so you push your partner away. Make an effort to learn how to be alone. Develop hobbies that you can do when your partner is away. Make plans with friends. Don’t rely on your partner to keep you feeling happy and secure. Because if you don’t do so, you will find yourself alone, permanently.
4. Be willing to talk about intimacy
For whatever reason, many women struggle with being able to talk about intimacy. Being intimate is a very important part of a good relationship. What do I mean by the ability to talk about intimacy? I mean the ability to communicate with your partner how you feel about the physical part of your relationship. If you are struggling with some aspect of it or particularly enjoy another.
Intimacy issues can wreak havoc in a good relationship and if partners aren't honest about how they are feeling the issues will snowball. On the other hand, the ability to talk about the good parts of your intimate life can only make it better. Being able to tell your partner what you like not only enhances your pleasure but talking about it outside of bed is fun! So make an effort to share your feelings about intimacy with your partner. And I can guarantee you if you tell your partner what you like about what he is doing he will be happy to accommodate you whenever you want him to.
5. Be honest
No relationship of any kind can survive without honesty. Why? Because honesty is the basis of trust and without trust, a relationship simply can’t succeed. You must be honest with your partner about everything, from the small and inconsequential to the very important, scary stuff. If you don’t like the way he slurps his coffee to the point that you don’t want to drink coffee with him, tell him. If you don’t like that you have to spend every Sunday morning with his parents, tell him.
Because if you are honest with your partner, you can work together to resolve an issue. If you don’t tell the truth then the issue will be left to fester and the relationship will founder. So tell the truth. Let your partner know that they can rely on you, to be honest with them about issues in your relationship. And if you do, they will respond in kind. And you will live happily ever after!
Being in a good relationship is a wonderful thing and something attainable for every woman. Work every day to develop and perfect the skills necessary to keep your relationship healthy and strong. Believe in yourself, talk about your feelings, be okay with being alone, talk about intimacy, and always be honest. These skills will get you far in your relationship and your life. And how great will that be?
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Mitzi Bockmann is an NYC-based Certified Life Coach and mental health advocate who works exclusively with women to help them be all they want to be. Mitzi's bylines have appeared in The Good Men Project, MSN, PopSugar, Prevention, Huffington Post, and Psych Central, among many others.
This article was originally published at Let Your Dreams Begin. Reprinted with permission from the author.