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They're always on the hunt.
By Donna Andersen — Written on Dec 20, 2020
What do sociopaths want from their romantic partners? Often, the answer is money — but sometimes it isn't.
My conman ex-husband took $227,000 from me, cheated with multiple women, and took money from them, as well, totaling more than $1 million.
To warn others about romance scammers like my ex, I launched Lovefraud.com. Through my research, I discovered that a large portion of people romantically involved with sociopaths lose money.
Some sociopaths lie, cheat, and abuse, but don't take money. This makes their partners wonder — are they really a sociopath?
If the sociopath isn't in it for money (i.e., they pay for everything with no access to your accounts), then what are other reasons to stay in a relationship if they don't live with you or share anything financially?
This is what you need to know: If a sociopath has targeted you, it's because you have something they want. Often it's money, but not always.
Here are 10 things a sociopath may want from you that has nothing to do with finances.
1. Sex.
Sociopaths crave stimulation, and sex is highly stimulating, so they pursue it.
However, sociopaths aren't slaves to their physical urges. They often use sex primarily as a tool of manipulation to get something else that they want.
2. Services.
Sociopaths may want you to do something for them that they don't want to do for themselves, such as cooking, cleaning, and taking care of children.
3. Housing.
Even if sociopaths don't directly ask for money, they may suggest living together. They may say it's because they love you, when, in fact, they have no place to go.
4. Entertainment.
Perhaps you're part of an exciting social scene. The sociopath may want to be with you just to gain access to the people you know.
5. Status.
Hanging out with you may be good for their image, especially if you're rich, famous, successful, or competent. Your status boosts their status.
6. Image.
For example, they might want to appear to be a family-oriented person, such as appearing to be a doting mother or proud father, when in reality, they could care less about you and the kids.
7. Cover.
Your presence may help them get away with a hidden agenda. You may be providing cover for the sociopath to pursue a double life of sex, drugs, or crime.
8. Connections.
Sociopaths may use you, your skills, and your connections in order to pursue their grandiose dreams or entrepreneurial plans.
9. They like tricking people.
Sociopaths enjoy getting over on people — this is called "duping delight." They often manipulate, deceive, and use people just for the fun of it.
Some will seduce targets just so they can break their hearts.
10. Domination.
Sociopaths feed on power and control, so they sometimes pursue domination for its own sake.
They want to prove themselves to be more powerful than you, perhaps even powerful enough to destroy you.
If a sociopath targets you, it's because they see you as useful in some way. Once you are no longer useful, you'll be dumped.
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Donna Andersen is the author of Love Fraud — How Marriage to a Sociopath Fulfilled My Spiritual Plan and founder of Love Fraud. She is an expert on sociopaths in relationships and offers personal consultations.
This article was originally published at Love Fraud. Reprinted with permission from the author.