Photo: GaudiLab / Shutterstock
The real reasons men don't call you back.
By Christian Carter — Written on Jan 24, 2022
How many times have you waited too long for a man to call and ask you out again after you had an amazing first date? He seemed truly interested, but then you never hear from him again. Why does this happen to so many women when they're dating? And what does it mean about men? (What are they thinking?)
Here are the 5 reasons why men aren't calling you back:
Reason 1: He's Having Trouble Being Honest
If you and a man hit it off, trade numbers, talk for a while, or trade emails, but he never seems to take the initiative to actually see you—then something else is going on.
Men often have a hard time sharing the truth about their feelings with women they've just met. Maybe he's already seeing someone else. It's fine to casually ask in a playful way, "I'm curious since you're kinda cute — are you dating anyone interesting right now?" Invite honesty from men and you'll get it. If you wait and wonder, you'll end up wasting your own time and energy.
Reason 2: He's Just Looking For a Fling
If a man really likes you, but he is more interested in a casual encounter and senses you're not that kind of girl, he'll move on—partially out of respect for you (or his own selfish desires). In either case, the timing is off. Not calling you back was his way of letting you know where he’s at without having to say it directly. Take heart, in this case, he's actually doing you a favor by not calling.
Reason 3: He Was Just Being Polite
Have you ever given your number to a man who asked for it, all the while dreading the idea of ever talking to him again? Men do something similar to women. Sometimes men can enjoy a conversation with you but not really be interested in anything more. In this case, a man was just being polite by asking for your number.
Reason 4: He Lost Interest
He was interested in you at first, but something happened along the way to change his mind about you. Maybe he sensed some anxiety from you that creeped him out. Or maybe he sensed a bit of desperation ("You're going to call me, right?"). Communicating either anxiousness or desperation early on before a man knows you are a sure attraction-killer.
Reason 5: He Lost Your Number or Forgot to Call
Yes, sometimes this really happens. Men lose your number and can't call. Unfortunately, when it does, women often fill their heads with all kinds of wild stories that only make them feel bad about themselves.
Now, what do all these situations have in common? For starters, none of these reasons have anything to do with who you are as a woman. It's your choice to give these situations with men the meaning you want.
If you're criticizing yourself because a guy didn't pick up the phone and call you, you’ll end up feeling more negative and overly-attached the next time you get on the phone and try and have a casual conversation with him or another man. It just won't feel right to him. And here's the thing: men can sense that and will instantly categorize you as a woman they don't want to be around.
More for You:
Christian Carter, author of the e-book “Catch Him & Keep Him” has helped more than 3 million women become more successful with men, dating, and relationships through his self-help writing and speaking. He conducts seminars and workshops and publishes his books, programs, and his free newsletter through his website here.