How To Tell If He's Really Into You On The 1st Date

How To Tell if He's Really Into You on The 1st Date

In Sandy’s initial emails, it appeared that she had dating all figured out. Later she admitted that after talking to Jim for three weeks, via texting, emailing and a few phone conversations that she felt as though there was finally some chemistry between she and a guy. It had been months since someone of this caliber had come along and she did not want to blow it. She asked the question that hundreds of other women ask each month: How do I know if he is as into me as I am him, especially on the first date? This question is often considered the “Rubik’s Cube” of dating. There are no concrete answers but I do have a few telltale signs that might ease your first date anxieties some.

Getting to the date: If there is mutual anticipation surrounding the first date this is a great sign that he is interested and primed! If he says something like, “I have been wanting to see you since we first spoke” that can be a clear sign that he wants more. His unsolicited excitement shows that this is not one-sided interest. Conversely, if you receive a luke-warm reception, after talking to this person for weeks via emailing, instant messaging and texting, his level of interest may not be the same as yours. Although, it can be common for guys to play it cool and not want to act to excited, so don’t judge everything by this sign.

Once on your date, if the date moves along with relative ease, this too is a good sign that he is interested in you. If during the night’s conversation he says, “ I know it’s getting late but I don’t want you to go,” he is saying that he wants to see more of you and soon. If the feeling is mutual, schedule another date. It’s ok. Now is not the time to play hard to get. If you wait or refuse to acknowledge his statement, he may not bring it up again and the chance to connect will have been lost.

If he asks questions about you, in an attempt to get to know what your likes and dislikes are, this is also an indicator that he is interested. He is gathering facts and information that will allow him to be successful on future encounters with you. If he asks, “So, what type of music or movies do you like?” he is setting the stage for extending the current date of setting up another date. Answer these questions honestly. If you answer these questions based on what you think he may like, you could find yourself listening to music or sitting through a movie that may not be appealing to you at all.

How your date ends can also be a sign that he is interested. If neither one of you want to bring the date to a close, chances are that he is very interested in seeing you again. If he utters, “ Are you sure you have to go?” this is your que that he is seeking to extend the evening. If possible, stay a little while longer. This will let him know that you too do not want the night to end. It’s a subtle boost to his ego and men love that. If at anytime during the evening you feel rushed, he is nonverbally saying that he is not that interested and he wants the date to end.

This last sign can be the clincher to you that he is interested in you. This is what I call the “Follow-Up”. If he contacts you the next day (to hell with that 48hour rule guys use) and reiterates how much he enjoyed the date you are in like Flynn. If you get a call and he says, “ I have been thinking about you constantly since we said goodnight” it’s on like Donkey Kong.

Congratulations! You have not only survived the first date but you want more and more importantly, so does he. These signs aren’t full proof but they are very good indicators that he too is interested in the wonderful you that you are.

You can email me anytime at, I would love to help you out with this topic.

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