Photo: Yuganov Konstantin / Shutterstock
The baby shouldn't be punished.
By Megan Quinn — Written on Dec 12, 2022
After a woman’s cousin became pregnant while cheating on her husband, she decided that, in spite of the baby's controversial birth, nothing would stop her by buying gifts for the new arrival.
However, her husband is “furious” with her. Now, the woman is torn on what she should do.
The woman’s husband told her to return her baby's gifts since the baby was conceived during an affair.
Posting her story on the subreddit, r/AmITheA–hole, the woman asked other Redditors if she was wrong for buying her cousin’s baby gifts at her husband’s disapproval.
The woman began her post by sharing that her cousin had cheating with the man her husband's sister was married to and is now seven months pregnant with his baby.
The woman claims that when she discovered the news, she kept it to herself for a few days.
However, she says that her brother-in-law “threw her under the bus” and revealed to his family that he had an affair with the woman’s cousin and she had known about it.
“It feels like I’m on thin ice with my husband and in-laws,” the woman wrote.
She explained that her cousin has a difficult family and financial situation.
“We don’t have a lot of family so my cousin doesn’t have anybody to help her and she also isn’t in a good financial situation right now,” the woman wrote.
Hoping to assist her cousin, the woman decided to buy a few gifts for her baby. However, her husband came across them before the woman had the chance to give them to her cousin.
He expressed his anger over his wife’s actions given that the baby was conceived in an affair.
“He is furious with me for continuing to speak to her and for spending his money on her,” the woman wrote. “He wants me to return everything and not help her after what she did to his sister.”
The woman was forced into a difficult situation and had conflicting feelings about her husband and cousin.
“I understand why he's upset but my cousin needs the help and her baby is the only one who'll miss out if I don't,” she wrote.
The woman asked Redditors if she made the right decision buying her cousin’s baby gifts in the first place.
Many Redditors supported the woman’s decision and acknowledged the difficult predicament she is facing.
“Punishing a baby for simply being the product of an affair is messed up. The child did not consent to or participate in the circumstances that they were born,” one user commented.
“Not to mention that from the sounds of it OP [original poster] isn’t spending money on the cousin, she’s spending money on the baby.”
“A baby is coming into the world and your SIL and BIL need to figure things out between themselves,” another user pointed out.
Others were curious as to why no one in the woman’s family appeared to be angry with her brother-in-law since he also participated in the affair.
“It takes two to have an affair, and it takes two to have a baby, but it seems all the blame fell on your cousin, not on the married man who got her pregnant,” one user wrote.
“It's never okay to knowingly sleep with someone who is in a relationship, but his behavior is worse than hers because he is the only one who broke vows in this situation,” another user commented.
Hopefully, the baby that resulted in this affair will be taken care of and not treated as less than others due to their complicated family situation.
Megan Quinn is a writer at YourTango who covers entertainment and news, self, love, and relationships.