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He claims his stepdad is just being "spiteful."
By Nia Tipton — Written on Feb 08, 2023
A teenager is being defended after he was asked for money by his stepfather to continue living under his parents' roof.
Posting to the subreddit "r/AmItheA--hole" (AITA) — a forum where users try to figure out if they were wrong or not in an argument that has been bothering them — he explained that on the day he turned 18, his stepfather approached him about starting to pay rent.
"I don’t [expect] to live rent-free forever but I know my stepdad is coming from a spiteful place," he wrote in his Reddit post, adding that his stepfather refers to their house as his.
He refuses to get a job and doesn't want to give his stepfather money to continue living with his parents.
The newly 18-year-old claims that his stepfather doesn't see him as his "own" because he is a "conservative" and "quite Christian."
"He and my mum have 2 kids in 9 years of marriage," he explained. "I’m not his own and it’s clear I’m a reminder that his wife was a non-virgin divorced woman before him so, of course, I’m being treated like a guest."
He continued, writing that his mother doesn't defend him against his stepfather because she doesn't see anything wrong.
With only a few months until he's off to university, he doesn't have much money to spend and his stepfather is demanding over $100 a month for rent.
"We still have lots of time for this but I bet his own kids won’t be paying rent while they’re in school."
He pointed out that he is unable to get a job because if he does, he won't be able to split his time evenly between working and studying for all of his exams, since he wants to do well and therefore dedicates all of his free time to studying.
Part of why he doesn't want to pay rent is because he'll be moving out soon in order to go to school.
Since he'll be moving out of his home to attend university, something that both his stepfather nor his mom won't be paying for, he wants to save some money.
"I’m trying to save the money I had left from my last job for when I move out too and paying my stepdad £800 ($965.33) when he doesn’t need it feels spiteful and like he’s punishing me and making my life harder for being born."
As a solution, his aunt, who is his mother's sister, offered the teenage boy a room at her home to come and live since she isn't "fond" of his stepfather.
"She said she has a guest room free so I can save my money for [university]," he revealed. "This benefits me most so I took her up on the offer."
Since taking the room at his aunt's house, his mother has been distraught, while his stepfather is just plain annoyed.
"We got into an argument where he said he’s just treating me like a tenant to prepare me for the real world, so I said, 'do tenants not have the right to leave?' Which annoyed him further."
His stepfather claims that he's only "hurting" his mother by leaving, calling the teen "too entitled" to stay and pay rent.
"This is just what’s best for me. I said I’d visit," he concluded.
Most people who commented on the teen's Reddit post agreed that he was NTA (Not The A--hole).
"I’m sorry you have to deal with this situation but congratulations on figuring out a solution — you’re handling this beautifully," one user wrote.
Another user added, "you're legally an adult now if you want to move into your aunt's house to save up for [university] that's your choice."
"Your mum and stepdad don't really have the right to stop you. Also, it sounds like the right situation for you."
A third user chimed in, "sure you’re 18 but there’s no need to charge you rent. You have options to go elsewhere so you can live rent-free and focus on your studies."
"You’re doing what’s in your best interest while leaving a step-parent with a chip on their shoulder."
Nia Tipton is a writer living in Brooklyn. She covers pop culture, social justice issues, and trending topics. Keep up with her on Instagram and Twitter.