Dad Refuses To Turn Home Office Into His Adult Daughter's Bedroom After She Moves Back In

He's offered her the guest bedroom instead.

Last updated on Feb 27, 2024

older man on laptop in home office and annoyed woman Monkey Business Images and Dean Drobot / Shutterstock
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According to Census information reported on by The Hill, in 2022, at least 19% of adult men and 12% of adult women lived with their parents. The reasons an adult child would have to move back in with their parents differ, but most would agree that the situation is meant to be temporary.

For one father who found himself in this temporary situation, agreeing to let his daughter move in did not equate to giving up the home office he'd established for himself, which has caused a rift between the family.

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He refuses to turn his home office back into his daughter's bedroom after she moves back in.

In his Reddit post, the man explained that his daughter moved in with her boyfriend two years prior. During this time, he accepted a job at a company that allowed him to work from home.

"Half of my job is talking to clients on zoom so I needed a quiet place in the house," he wrote, deciding to use his daughter's former room as an office as it's on a separate floor from the main rooms in the house, providing the quiet he needs to do his job.

home officePhoto: Collov Home Design / Unsplash

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Just recently, his daughter told him and his wife, her mother, that she would be moving back in with them since her boyfriend accepted a job abroad and she doesn't want to go with him. Both he and his wife agreed that she was more than welcome to move back in with them.

"We have a spare room in our house that we used to use as a guest bedroom but we haven't had any overnight guests in years so we just decided that she could move in there," he wrote. Once their daughter moved in, however, she began complaining about not being able to stay in her old bedroom. "She's been constantly nagging us to get her old bedroom back because it's bigger and is on a separate floor so there's more privacy."

He tried to explain to his daughter that her old room has now become his new home office and that he prefers working in there, but she won't listen and has managed to get her mother on her side, so now the two of them have started "nagging" him about her old bedroom.

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The man revealed that he is unable to turn the spare bedroom into his office because it's on the same floor "as the other kids' rooms and the living room," so he won't be able to have peace while he works, even behind closed doors.

"I told them point blank that I'm not giving up my office. And now they're treating me like I'm the enemy," he concluded.

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Most people who commented on the man's Reddit post agreed that he was justified in keeping his office as-is.

"You offered her the guest room to use as her own. If she doesn't like it then she can find her own house," one person wrote.

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In fact, certified financial planner Jim Kinney has agreed that parents shouldn't acquiesce to all of their adult child's needs if they find themselves in this situation because “If they’re a little too comfortable at home,” he told The Hill, “maybe you need to make it a little uncomfortable.” 

Experts suggest creating a contract between the family that clearly outlines boundaries and expectations for everyone to follow when an adult child moves in.

While it's natural for parents to want to help their kids, even when they're adults, ultimately, the best thing that parents can do is give their children the space to become self-sufficient.

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Nia Tipton is a Chicago-based entertainment, news, and lifestyle writer whose work delves into modern-day issues and experiences.