Parents Spark Debate After Saying They Lock Their Bedroom Door To Stop Their Child From Coming In

Are they being too harsh?

Mom and child in bed Liderina/Shutterstock

Parenting decisions are always a hot topic for debate. A parent on Reddit is learning that after expressing that they want to start locking their bedroom door at night to prevent their child from getting into bed with them. Their spouse disagrees. Now they are wondering if they are making the right decision. 

The anonymous parent shared their story on the subreddit thread, “r/AmItheA–hole” (AITA), seeking the opinion of other users regarding the situation. Users had the choice to give them a “You’re the A–hole” (YTA) rating if they believed that they were wrong or a “You’re Not the A-hole” (YNTA) rating if they thought they were not. 


The parents want to lock their bedroom door at night to keep their child from coming in. 

They began their post by saying that their 5-year-old child refuses to sleep in their own bed despite numerous attempts to get them to do so. The child often comes into their parent’s bedroom at night to sleep with them. 



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“They just simply wake up and waltz right in, sometimes 5 minutes after bedtime, sometimes 5 hours,” the concerned parent wrote. “It's a nightmare to get them back to their own room and usually ends up in an argument with my spouse; who simply doesn't care and lets my kid cosleep.” 

They added that there is a lock on their bedroom door, but their spouse does not allow them to use it. 

However, they want to start locking their bedroom door at night to bar their child from entering during the night. The parent believes that this will teach the child that they need to sleep in their own bed at night

“I think by having our door locked at night we can teach our kid some "tough love" and I totally expect the first few nights to be terrible, but I'm hoping that by the end of a week or so my kid would hopefully learn they can't come in anymore."


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However, their spouse has expressed disapproval over the decision. “Naturally my spouse is against this and thinks I'm an a–hole for wanting to "lock my kid out," the parent wrote. So reddit, am I the a–hole?” 

The parent added that they have been attempting to sleep-train their child since they were two and have tried multiple methods to get their child to sleep in their own bed to no avail. 

Many Redditors slammed the parent on their decision to lock their bedroom door at night and pointed out that it was unsafe and would only harm their child. 

“YTA. Locking them out isn’t sleep training. Kids regress around this age and you have to actually sleep train,” one user pointed out.




“I think this is too much "tough love" for a five-year-old. They won't understand and will be stuck in the house while the parents ignores them,” another user wrote. 

“Say you lock the kid out, they sleep a few hours and you fall asleep, that child is then going to be panicking and alone without parental supervision. They aren’t going to just turn around and get back in the bed.”

One user acknowledged the dangers of parents locking their bedroom door at night, while also suggesting that the parent and their spouse reach a civil agreement on how to handle the situation. 


“Coming from someone whose house burned down in the middle of the night when I was a child and I went running for parents room because my dad always slept through loud sounds… DO NOT LOCK THE DOOR!! It’s simply not safe, everyone thinks the worst won’t happen to them until it does,” the Redditor wrote. 

“However you’re not wrong for wanting your child to sleep in their own bed, but it sounds like you and your wife aren’t on the same page. If she’s still so insistent on co-sleeping maybe it’s time to talk to a counselor because there are so many stories out there of marriages suffering from couples who never get any alone time,” they added. 

Hopefully, the parents will soon discover a solution so that everyone can sleep peacefully at night. 


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Megan Quinn is a writer at YourTango who covers entertainment and news, self, love, and relationships.