The Honest Truth Behind Being Afraid Of Letting People In

Photo: Andrii Kobryn / Shutterstock
woman worrying

By Yunesta Soedarmasto

This is what happens when you’re like me and you meet someone new.

You build this wall around you; this barrier between you and everyone around you, because letting people in is the scariest thing you can possibly do.

It doesn’t matter who the person is, or what your relationship to them might turn out to be — you do the same things every time because you would rather be alone in this world than let someone see who you are.

You’d rather be alone than let someone see the parts of you that you can’t bear to take out of hiding.

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You weren’t always like this, though.

You weren’t always living life afraid of what might happen if you open up too soon; if you open up at all.

You were once eager to meet new people, to build new relationships. And then someone hurt you.

Someone hurt you so bad you were left wondering why you put yourself in that position in the first place, why you’ve ever put yourself in that position.

Someone hurt you and left you to pick up the pieces of yourself that were ripped apart.

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Here’s the thing about being too afraid to open up to people.

You think you can do this all alone. You think you can handle everything life hands you without needing anyone else.

You rely on yourself and only yourself, because asking for help is too much.

Losing your pride and risking it all is just too much for you to do.

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Being vulnerable in any way scares the crap out of you. Trust me, I know.

But you need to realize that you cannot possibly do everything on your own and that’s okay.

You’re allowed to open up to people, to ask for help.

You have to trust that not everyone is going to hurt you the way you’ve been hurt before.

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You will find people who need you just as much as you need them, and that’s normal.

You will find people who will help you pick up the pieces of what was left behind after you decided to let your fear of getting hurt take over your life.

You will be able to trust that you can open up to someone and let them in and not worry about getting hurt.

Because humans are social beings, and there’s no way you can live your life without opening up and letting other people in, no matter how hard you might try.

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Yunesta Soedarmasto is a freelance writer, lifestyle blogger, and brand marketing consultant. Visit her author profile on Unwritten for more of her work.

This article was originally published at Unwritten. Reprinted with permission from the author.