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How to push through this nightmare scenario.
By Roland Legge — Written on Aug 11, 2021
You have hit rock bottom. You are feeling hopeless. Your big question is how to start over in life with nothing.
Using your age as a justification to keep the status quo is a poor excuse. The good news is that it is never too late to start again. You will know when you are ready.
If you are tired and fed up with the status quo and feeling ready to take the first step back to wholeness, your time has come.
All it takes is a flicker of hope to inspire you. The only thing you need to do is say yes.
Starting life over again is no quick fix. But with your hard work and perseverance, you have an excellent chance to find joy, hope and meaning in your life.
You may want to start over after a divorce, job loss, health issues, emotional or sexual abuse, addictions, a death in the family, or another traumatic event.
No person has a perfect life. We are all human and thus imperfect. So there is no shame in acknowledging that you are having trouble.
Then it is your responsibility to own your issues and make the needed changes in your life.
Here are 7 ways on how to start over in life with nothing:
1. Accept what is.
If you want to change, you need to accept where you are in life. It is time to be one hundred percent honest with yourself.
If you want to start over in life with nothing, you need to get in touch with your emotions and sensations. It can be challenging to face them because you have repressed them for years.
The more you try to ignore them, the more intense they become.
You might find exercise and meditation help you stay present when you allow yourself to feel your intense pain. The more you choose to feel them, the less control they will have over you.
Journaling might be an excellent way to release all the jumbled thoughts in your mind at this challenging time.
Practice radical gratitude and notice all the good things in your life. They don’t have to be big things.
For example, they could include the gift of life, enough food, shelter, and friends. It is hard to be miserable when you are grateful.
2. Embrace change.
Life is full of change. No matter how hard you try, you are never going to stop change.
You are better off when you allow yourself to move with the change. Instead of fearing change, it is time to go with the flow. Set your mind to discover and embrace your many skills and gifts.
To help you realize your skills and gifts, ask yourself what you want to do that you have never gotten around to doing. Now is the perfect time to step out into the unknown and start the next chapter of your life.
This part of the journey requires faith that life can get better. All you need is enough openness to take the first few steps.
To start over in life with nothing requires courage, curiosity and hope. You can make it happen!
3. Find a mentor.
You are human, and you need the support and encouragement of others to motivate you to make a fundamental change in your life.
Your mentor might be a friend, family member or professional. Coaches and counselors can be helpful to keep you on track toward a better life.
Find a person who will help you dive deep to discover your purpose. Stay away from anyone who tells you what you should do.
You will start to answer the question: how to start over in life with nothing.
4. Self Care.
During significant times of transition, you need sound physical, emotional, mental and spiritual health.
It is time to make sure you are feeding yourself good food, getting plenty of sleep and exercise, and looking after your mental health.
It is time to start loving yourself. Being kind to yourself is an integral part of learning how to start over in life with nothing.
You will not get anywhere if you are not able to see your worth.
If your mind is busy, you might find one of many forms of meditation useful to quiet the noise. There are several good apps for your smartphone.
My favorite app is called Insight Timer. Keep trying different forms of meditation until you find one that works for you.
If you are learning new habits, remember to start gradually. If you are just beginning meditation, maybe only start with five minutes and gradually increase it to 30 minutes over time.
When you start any new activity that requires exertion, start progressively, allowing yourself to build up muscle strength.
5. Self Awareness.
You will move more gently through change with a self-awareness of what is happening within and around you.
A great tool to help you on this journey is called the enneagram. It is a psychological-spiritual tool intended to help you be present in your body, heart, and head.
You learn through the sensations of your body; you learn through the emotions and the heart’s longings; you connect with the universe through your quiet mind.
You will discover your enneagram type that will show you how you react under stress and give you clues about how to respond to life in healthier ways.
There are many great resources, teachers and coaches to help you use the enneagram to rebuild your life.
Want to learn more about the enneagram? You'll find a detailed guide here.
6. Recreation.
Does this all feel too overwhelming and demanding? If you desire to move ahead, it is essential to take time for fun and relaxation.
Think of what you find relaxing. Maybe you love to curl up and read a book or watch a favorite movie. Perhaps you enjoy going out for a meal with a friend and then to a film or live theatre.
Do you have any hobbies that you have ignored? Do you enjoy writing? Do you love to take photos? Maybe you like to cook.
If at all possible, it is best to share these activities with people you love and respect. These are the people that bring out the best in you.
7. Let go.
With the help of the enneagram, along with any modalities that help you to connect with your inner self, you will start to notice when you get caught up in the lies you tell yourself over and over.
Gradually with practice, you will become aware when you get caught in your ego, and then you will have the ability to make better decisions.
Long term, you will begin to let go of the habits that no longer serve you and replace them with a new routine that will free you up to be your best self.
It is time to let go of all the negativity in life and open to new possibilities.
How to start over in life with nothing?
It takes courage, self-love and determination to make a significant change in your life. Give yourself credit for waking up and taking the first few steps.
As you journey into a new life, it will be essential to follow these seven steps. If you feel you are getting stuck, don’t be afraid to reach out for help.
You can do this! You are worth it, and you are not alone! If you believe in a higher power, whether God, Spirit, or Universe, ask these loving energies to guide you on your journey.
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Roland Legge is a Certified Identity Life Coach and a minister in the United Church of Canada in Yorkton, Saskatchewan. You can join his newsletter for free advice and sign up for your 30 Minute Discovery Call at no charge to you.