Love, Sex

The BRUTAL Truth About Why Guys Lie To Women — And Why They Think It's OK

Photo: Photo by Lesly B. Juarez on Unsplash
why men lie to women

No one knows why human beings have the ability to lie, and even though Ricky Gervais did his best with that rather shitty movie about lying, it's unlikely that we will ever know why lying, a human concept, is so much a part of human DNA.

Lying is damaging to your relationships, especially to your romantic ones. If you lie to your partner and they catch you in that lie (or even if they just get suspicious that you might be lying) it damages trust. When trust goes in a relationship, it's like someone setting off a bomb in your basement: Everything goes when the foundation gets blown to smithereens. 

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It's hard enough to answer the question of why we tell lies ourselves, and it's almost impossible to figure out why men lie, especially the men in our lives who we love dearly. These men have a huge place in our lives and hearts. We've made them the center of our worlds, why on Earth do men lie when we've given them our hearts to take care of? 

I decided to ask a group of anonymous men why they have lied to their girlfriends and what they had to say what equal parts heartbreaking, enraging, and kind of... illuminating.

Okay dudes, let's get real: why do you lie to your girlfriends?

  • "Women lie all the time, so why shouldn't men lie? I mean, wearing makeup, that's a lie right there."
  • “I don't need to tell the truth to my girl when she asks why I can't answer the phone. I'm taking a massive shit. That's why.”
  • “I hardly ever lie, but I know some men who lie all the time. Then every once in a while I'll catch myself lying about some stupid inconsequential bullshit, and I'll be like, ‘I have no idea why I just said that.’”
  • “Quite often I'll have a legitimate excuse to not be able to attend plans with a girl and I'll brainstorm, ‘How can I get out of this one and make it believable?’ And then sometimes I realize I can just tell the truth. No idea why I lie so much, but it's usually about small things so I can stay home alone from everyone.”
  • "I try not to, but when it happens it's usually because I'm trying to avoid getting into a fight."
  • "It's such a catch-22. I lie to keep her from getting pissed, then she finds out and gets pissed anyway."
  • "There are two kind of lies in a relationship. There's the ones that are okay to tell (you don't look fat, etc) and then there are the one's that just aren't ('I did not have sex with someone' when you did.) One is actually saving the relationship, the other is destroying it."
  • "In my last relationship prior to my fiance, I lied all the time. I think I was trying to blow up the relationship, to have it end without being the one who really pulled the trigger and said, 'Hey it's over.'"
  • "Because she lied to me from the start."

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  • I hate it when my girlfriend cries. I only lie to her EVER to keep her from crying."
  • "Telling the truth might be the right thing to do, but lying is so much easier."
  • "If I'm being totally honest, sometimes I lie to her just to get her attention. Sometimes when you're with someone for a long time, you can feel overlooked. If I do something bad or whatever and lie about it and she finds out, like it or not, I'm the center of her attention again."

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