Heartbreak

13 Signs He's Full Of It (And You Should Move On)

Photo: Kayla Platt/ Shutterstock
man on bridge

We live in a time where the vast majority of people aren’t real. They may sound real, they may have shiny photos of themselves with friends on Instagram, and they may even have a trustworthy face, but make no mistake about it: most people you will meet are more plastic than Barbie.

The fact is that being fake is easily doable these days. Most of the time, people don’t have to face the consequences of being phony, primarily because it’s very rare to see someone assertive enough to call them out on their BS. Moreover, people who do call fakes out often end up looking worse than the fakes, so it rarely ever works out in their favor.

The problem with this should be pretty obvious: our dating pool is full of fake people.

Nowadays, the person who people claim to be and the person they are, are almost never the same.

In many cases, people will even play the “long con” and lie about what they want in a relationship with you just so they can get their needs met

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Here are 13 signs he's full of it — and you should move on:

1. He claims to be an expert in your interest, but when you ask him specific things about the topic, he can’t answer you

We’ve all been with someone who may have fibbed about their experience and interests to get us to talk to them. Perhaps they may have asked how to do something you’re good at as an icebreaker. That is okay.

What isn’t okay is when they claim to be total experts and try to act like they know more than you when they haven’t got a clue what they’re talking about. If they can’t tell you the very basics of what they claim to know more than you in, they’re lying to you and that’s a bad character trait.

2. You’ve caught him in lies before

This is bad and it should be a dealbreaker for a number of reasons. First off, he’s proven that he’s not trustworthy. Secondly, guys who have these issues tend to gaslight women, and that’s a form of emotional abuse. Lastly, no one deserves to have to constantly second-guess their partner. You can’t have a relationship without trust.

3. He always seems to have a reason why he can’t commit but regularly promises it’ll happen “later”

Guys who want to stay in almost-relationships are mavericks at coming up with excuses. The thing is that there’s really no excuse. If a guy wants to commit, he’ll commit. It won’t matter if he’s broke, depressed, or dealing with issues.

If you hear him coming up with excuses not to be official or take things to the next level, it’s best to understand that he’s making a decision to keep you orbiting without actually giving you what you need. This is, after all, the most basic definition of all talk.

4. You honestly feel crazy around him and can’t pinpoint why

I’ve noticed that most people who are fake have an innate ability to make people question their sanity around them. Sometimes, it’s not even something they say or do consciously. It’s just a weird vibe that puts you on edge and makes you want to gain their acceptance, but at the same time, it raises weird alarm bells because you know you’re not seeing the person they really are.

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5. You haven’t really seen a bad side of him come out

People who are really fake will never let you see them lose their cool when they’re angry or upset. In fact, they may never even show any emotion whatsoever. Though some may disagree, I’m of the school that a person who won’t show you how they’re feeling when they should be upset is generally people who are too fake to bother with.

6. Any time you complain to him, he turns it around on you

This is the ultimate gaslighting trick and it’s one that too many people seem to love to use. If he’s done this to you, it's one of the signs he's full of shit. You can rest assured that he’s too full of himself, to be honest with you and that he’ll never admit to wrongdoing. 

7. When you ask him something directly, he parrots it back to you before he answers you

This is a form of stalling that most guys do when put on the spot. Most of the time, when guys do this, they know they’re caught. So, to avoid it being disadvantageous, they’ll take time to answer.

8. He never tells you the full truth or if he does tell you everything, the story never stays straight

If you aren’t sure whether he’s being honest, take a look at the two most common signs that he’s lying. Men who are full of shit will lie by omission, use wheedle words, and, at times, just fudge the truth until what happens suits their narrative better.

9. He’s image-obsessed

From my experience, the people who are most prone to lying are the ones who are also the most obsessed with their image. The reason why is that they feel they have more to lose if people realize they’re an a**hole.

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10. You often question if he really cares

If you have to ask, then there’s a good chance that you already know he doesn’t. Or, if he does, he still cares more about his own needs than yours.

11. When you look at things objectively, his actions don’t match his words

This is a big indicator that something isn’t right. If he can’t even walk the walk, you should be walking away from him. Guys who are legitimately honest have things that back up their words. 

12. He ghosted you

A man who ghosts a woman has shown himself to be of really piss-poor character. Ghosting, when done to someone who probably won't lash out or hurt you, is a spineless act that shows that you have zero spines and zero integrity. How can you expect a man who ghosts women to do right by you, or even face you like a real person should? The truth is, you can't. 

13. People act strangely around you when they find out that you're his girl

This is a typical sign he's full of it and that they may have seen him with someone else or that they know something you don't.

When this happened to me, I found out that the guy I was dating was saying horrible things about me behind everyone's back. Needless to say, this is a moment where you may want to ask someone what's really going on. 

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Ossiana Tepfenhart is a writer whose work has been featured in Yahoo, BRIDES, Your Daily Dish, New Theory Magazine, and others.