Sex

How A Needle In The Penis Is Helping Men Have Better Sex (OUCH)

Photo: Twitter
penis erectile dysfunction sex

I think we’re all adults here. We can admit that sometimes, when we have sex, things … happen, out of our control. There are times when a guy just can’t get it up, or maybe he did but it went flaccid before anything can happen.

There are so many factors as to why it happens but eventually, it happens to every one!

For a while, everyone was all about the Viagra, the little blue pill that magically made your penis erect, with both scary and hilarious side effects.

I know people who would sell it on the black market and make a FORTUNE. Which just proves once again that SEX sells. And if you have to pay to get your parts working, it's worth it! 

But now, there's an alternative. For those who don't want to risk the side effects of Viagra, there's a new procedure called the P-Shot (Priapus Shot).

Per the official site, Priapus is the Greek god of fertility while priapus (without a lower case "P") is a synonym for "penis." 


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The procedure is pretty simple and only lasts about 30 minutes.

An anesthetic is applied to the location on the penis that causes erectile dysfunction. Blood is then drawn from your arm (no fancy stuff, just a regular blood draw) and put into a centrifuge (basically, a container that uses the speed of freakin' light to separate liquids like blood, plasma, etc).

This is where it gets a bit murky for us laypeople: The platelets that were taken from the blood draw are transferred into another tube, mixed with a few drops of calcium solution to trick the platelets into thinking they're in an injured body. This is often used with athletes to help with injuries. The liquid is put into a syringe and injected into the penis.

Not so bad, right?


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BUT WAIT! THERE'S MORE!

According to the official website, if the Priapus Shot does what it should, then using it on the penis should result in all of the following:

Immediately larger
Strengthen the penis
Straighten the penis
Increase circulation within the penis for a healthier organ.
Make other therapies work better (if you still need Viagra or Cialis, then it will work better for you).
Increase sensation and pleasure 
Proven to work in multiple studies
Increase size by design (Can place more in base or in the head or wherever makes for best result)
No allergic reactions (using your own body’s fluids)
No lumpiness
Minimal pain 

So, what's this shot going to run you? Well, it's probably not covered under insurance, and it's around $1,900. But look at all the UPLIFTING side effects!

Now, ladies, it wouldn't be fair if we didn't include you, right? There's an O-Shot (Orgasm Shot) which is basically the same procedure but it's shot into your vagina.

YAY EQUALITY?


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In case you're interested, here's a video that talks about BOTH shots: