Yes, really!
By John Gray and Dorothy Camp and melanie and Foojan Zeine and Garet Bedrosian and Tabatha Bird Weaver — Written on Jul 22, 2016
What should you do when your marriage is in trouble and your husband refuses to go to couples therapy?
You’ve talked and talked to your husband about the problems in your marriage until you’re blue in the face. The same arguments keep resurfacing over and over with no compromise or resolution. Things are starting to feel desperate and you’re fearful that divorce is on the horizon.
You’ve tried everything you can think of and read about to help your marital situation but nothing seems to be working or helping.
It feels like every attempt at discussion results in finger pointing, blame, anger, and withdrawal. You’ve even resorted to withholding sex to drive home your frustrations to him, but that only resulted in more pain and confusion and escalated arguments.
Feeling frantic with no solution in sight, you repeatedly encourage him to try couples therapy and he resolutely refuses. And not just a "no," but a "hell no!"
No matter how you plead and try to calmly explain how you think therapy could save your marriage, he just digs in his heals and is unwilling to consent. Why can't he see how much trouble your marriage is in? Why isn't he willing to do more to help? Why do you have to do all the work?
What more can you do?
You’re at your wits end and bone-tired of trying to fix him and your relationship. Something has got to give or you’re leaving. He won’t change and you’re completely at a loss as to what more to do.
If for no other reason than your own sanity, you’re considering just going to therapy alone. What can it hurt? At least you might get some new ideas on how to communicate with him or make him see just how ready you are to jump ship! At least it will give you someone to talk to who will listen!
Our panel of YourTango Experts will absolutely give you inspiration and encouragement to make the choice to seek therapy on your own, regardless of your husband’s choices. You will learn how self-realization and analysis can give you new tools to improve your life and your relationships.
Our Senior VP Melanie Gorman starts the discussion on this topic with Author and Relationship Expert John Gray, Psychotherapist Tabatha Bird Weaver, Marriage & Family Therapist Dr. Foojan Zeine and Marriage & Couples Counselor Garet Bedrosian. Their perspectives on this topic bring to light how therapy can definitely benefit you and perhaps, ultimately, your marriage!
Feel free to visit their websites, or better yet, contact John, Tabatha, Foojan or Garet directly for more information on relationships and self improvement!