Photo: Getty Images
Sometimes, it's really just that simple.
By Ossiana Tepfenhart — Written on Mar 17, 2022
It's normal for physical attraction and desire to wax and wane over the course of any long-term relationship or marriage. So in and of itself, a dry spell in the bedroom is neither a big deal nor something you should necessarily worry yourself about.
What is a big deal requiring your attention and concern is when your boyfriend or husband no longer seems to be attracted to you at all and doesn't want to have sex with you.
As painful as it can be, it's important to notice if this is happening in your relationship.
After all, there may still be a chance to rekindle that flame if you catch it just as it's beginning to die out.
If you're concerned that your boyfriend or husband is not sexually attracted to you anymore, check for these telltale signs.
1. He has difficulty getting erections on a regular basis.
This is one of the most obvious indicators that something's amiss in your love life.
Assuming that he's healthy and in a generally good mood, there's no reason he shouldn't be able to get an erection regularly.
2. He chooses masturbation over sex with you more and more often.
There's nothing wrong with enjoying some good old-fashioned self-love, but when you know for a fact that he's rejecting your advances in favor of masturbation, there's a problem.
3. He no longer touches you.
This doesn't necessarily refer to having sex. Simple gestures like kissing, cuddling, or even just holding your hand are indicators that a guy is still attracted to you.
If he's outright recoiling when you try to hold or touch him, he's losing (or may have completely lost) his attraction to you.
4. The way he talks to you sounds more like the way a guy would talk to his sister, roommate, or guy friend.
When he begins to treat you like a roommate rather than like a wife or girlfriend, you should be concerned. This is often a sign that he's stopped viewing you as a sexual being.
5. His overall demeanor has become cold, distant, or aggressive.
This is often a sign that he's checked out of the relationship, and it means he most likely stopped being into you in that way a long time ago.
6. He almost always rejects you and comes up with reasons not to have sex with you.
If he's not even remotely receptive to your sexual advances, chances are high that he's lost interest.
During a lower libido spell, he'll still be open to sexual encounters some of the time. He just won't be as likely to initiate or take you up on the offer as frequently as he may otherwise.
7. Your body underwent major changes, and he's made note of it.
Though it's not what anyone wants to hear, men are visual creatures.
If you gained significant weight and he's told you he's noticed, there may be a chance that your boyfriend or husband might not find you as attractive as he did when you first got together.
8. Everything you do seems to upset him.
When someone is really into you on a physical level, they will overlook all the little annoying quirks you have.
When someone stops being attracted to you, all those little quirks become increasingly annoying, and they may even make your formerly chill significant other get snippy with you.
9. He only wants to be sexual with you when he's been drinking.
If it's gotten to the point that he feels like he needs beer goggles in order to be into you, his interest is long gone.
10. Something just feels "off."
Some guys pull off a really good façade of interest, even when they've checked out of a relationship.
If your gut is telling you that he's just not into you anymore, you might want to listen to your intuition.
More for You:
Ossiana Tepfenhart is a writer based out of Red Bank, New Jersey. She writes primarily about lifestyle, food, finance, and relationships. Follow her on Twitter.