The Best Aphrodisiac In The World Is NOT Oysters

Oscar Wilde once suggested that sarcasm is the lowest form of wit. Well, to hell with Oscar Wilde.

Sarcasm has been a saving grace in my life.

It's an awesome defense mechanism, for starters, but beyond that, it's also super-effective in the art of flirting and creating sexual tension.

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Before you get offended, please note: I only suggest using sarcasm if you have an appropriate mastery of it.

This is to say that if sarcasm has failed you in the past, it's because there's a strong possibility you don't know how to use it. If you're scratching your head trying to figure out where you stand on the sarcastic scale, don't bother. Sarcastic people take pride in their craft and have no doubt in their ability.

Let's explore further, shall we?

Sarcastic individuals are generally very quick on their feet — they have a rebuttal to anything and everything. People who can keep the conversation flowing easily attract others and people who excel in sarcasm exude confidence. Even if the sarcasm is merely a defense mechanism, it's not like others can tell — and that's the point. Confidence = sexy. 

When sarcasm is done appropriately, it should be a perfect blend of playful and snarky. Remember back in grammar school when boys would pick on the girls they like? It's sort of like that but you obviously can't just go pulling the hair of a girl you're interested in, so that's where sarcasm comes in.

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You never really know when a sarcastic individual is being serious or not. This inevitably leads to mystery — and mystery breeds intrigue.

If you have a sarcastic individual accompany you as the date to a wedding or work function, they'll most definitely be able to relieve any boredom or awkwardness you may encounter.

Some sarcastic individuals are so slick that others may not even notice what they're doing (except hopefully you, of course). This will add an element of excitement and excitement outside of the bedroom typically leads to excitement inside the bedroom.

While sarcastic individuals can have a harder edge to them, they can also be incredibly perceptive and sensitive to the feelings of those around them. It takes a certain level of intuitiveness to pull off sarcasm effortlessly.

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There's something innately attractive about someone who has a good sense of people; that really shouldn't be a surprising notion. There's nothing worse than going out on a date with a stiff, let alone being monogamous with one.

If you can make someone laugh, you're automatically more likable. That likeness leads to attraction more often than not, plus humor comes in handy in more ways than one.

For instance, getting into an argument with your significant other can be a weird aphrodisiac (make-up sex!) but if things get too nasty, it can have the complete opposite effect.

Sometimes fighting fire with sarcasm instead of with more fire can diffuse the flames quickly and even bring a sense of lightheartedness to the situation.

So to those sarcastic ladies and gentlemen out there, don't be ashamed of your skills. Just use them wisely.

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Melissa Copelton is the senior staff writer at Life and Style magazine. She writes about love, relationships, and celebrity news.