Women Who Quietly Command Respect Without Demanding It Usually Have These 5 Traits, According To Psychology
They gain approval without raising their voice a single decibel.
Time Bernhard | Unsplash Have you ever seen a woman walk into a room and notice the way the energy in the room changes? Maybe you subconsciously keep track of their movements throughout the room or find yourself keeping track of the facial expressions for social cues.
These women have an effortless presence about them that naturally commands respect from everyone around them. Can these traits be learned? Short answer: of course.
Women who quietly command respect without demanding it usually have these 5 traits:
1. Self-confidence
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A man wants a woman who knows exactly who she is and is happy with that. And a woman who will tell him exactly what it is that she wants. A woman who can just be herself. A woman confidently walks down the street rocking her cowboy boots and tight jeans.
Why? Because a man doesn’t want a woman who isn’t sure of herself, who relies on him to make her feel good. A man doesn’t want a woman who needs him to guess what he can do to make her feel happy and secure. He wants to be told what is needed so that he can do it (and not screw up!).
So, if you aren’t feeling so good about yourself, it’s time to work on that. And the only way to build your self-confidence is to go out there and earn it.
Set a goal for yourself. Make a plan. Make it happen. If you do, you will feel good about yourself. I promise.
2. Independence
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A man wants an independent woman. While men do love women who will lean on them at times for love and support, they don’t want a woman who needs them there at all times to take care of her.
A man wants a woman who has her own life, her friends, her career, and who enjoys being with him but doesn’t need to be at all times.
Why independence? We all need our space sometimes, and an independent woman will be fine letting their man do his own thing. And an independent woman is someone a man has to work for, and nothing intrigues a man more than someone he has to work for.
A 2024 study explained that these women gain respect not through demanding it, but through their consistent and authentic presence, signaling competence, integrity, and self-awareness. They embody a set of habits that include active listening, empathy, comfort with their authentic selves, consistency, respect for boundaries, willingness to be vulnerable, and kindness.
3. A love of laughter
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On the dating site Match, the number one most requested trait in a partner is a sense of humor. This was over physical looks and financial security.
Why? Because laughter brings people together, and that is what love is all about, being together.
I am not saying that you should go out and buy a book of jokes so that you will have some at the ready on your next date. What I am saying is to keep your mind and heart open to laughter when your guy says or does something to make you laugh.
Men love to make their women laugh. I am not sure what part of their prehistoric brain needs feeds but, without exception, the men I know want to be able to make a girl laugh.
Humor and laughter can help break down barriers and create a sense of ease and connection with others. An article by the Rochester Business Journal explained that this can make a leader appear more approachable and relatable, facilitating open communication and trust.
4. Curiosity
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Men are looking for women who are curious about life and ask questions to quench that curiosity: What lights me up that I haven't made time for lately? What's something my partner values that I haven't asked about in a while? What do I believe I'm capable of, but haven't dared to pursue yet?
Women who command respect often possess a strong sense of inner confidence, curiosity, and self-assuredness. One study found that this may extend to their ability to communicate their desires and boundaries, leading to a greater potential for intimacy confidence.
5. Femininity
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My boyfriend appreciates my self-confidence and independence, but I remember the first time he saw me in a dress. He had only ever seen me in jeans and hiking clothes, and there I was, suddenly looking like a snack. His jaw actually dropped.
Men also like women who can (at least sometimes) open the door for them, who let them make them laugh, women who make a man feel like a man.
If you were wondering what traits men look for in a long-term partner, I hope my list has been helpful.
Men want women who can be themselves in a relationship, who want happiness and laughter and intimacy, and who make men wonder, just a little bit, who this amazing woman is they have been so lucky to end up sitting beside.
So find your inner self-confident, independent, open, and best self and go out there and rock some guy’s world.
Mitzi Bockmann is a NYC-based Certified Life Coach who works with individuals who strive to heal their toxic relationships so they can have their happily ever after. Mitzi's bylines have appeared in The Good Men Project, MSN, PopSugar, Prevention, Huffington Post, Psych Central, among many others.
