Woman Takes Business Class Upgrade On A Flight And Leaves Her Ex To Take Care Of His Kid By Himself

Women deserve a break, too.

woman relaxes in business class flight with glass of champagne Stockshakir / Shutterstock

After a woman and her boyfriend’s vacation ended on pretty uncomfortable terms, the woman accepted a business class upgrade on the flight back, leaving the boyfriend to take care of his son in coach.

The woman faced judgment for her decision, but she just wanted to relax away from the drama of her disappointing trip.

The woman took to Reddit to ask if she was wrong for taking the upgrade after having had enough.

In the AITA post, she explained she is 30, her boyfriend, whom she referred to as Matt, is 33, and they had been dating for about a year. His son, whom she called Alex, is just under 2 years old and from Matt’s first relationship, but she has helped look after him now and then to help Matt out.


She and her boyfriend decided to book a trip together for 10 days at the beginning of May.

@morescratchers AITA for leaving my ex to sit and take care of his child and taking a business class upgrade to myself. #reddit #fyp #redditreading #askreddit #redditstories #redditfeeds #payoffdept #payoffdebttrend #debtpayoff ♬ original sound- Stories Daily

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“Due to some family drama, Alex had to go with us,” the woman wrote. “The flights were over 8 hours long and I have booked the tickets for all of us. During the flight and the holiday, I have spent nearly all my time … looking after Alex while Matt had the time of his life.”

“Some things came to my attention (he was still seeing his ex),” she continued. “Which resulted in us breaking up at the end of our stay.”

Suffice it to say, their trip was nothing short of messy. During their flight back, when a flight attendant approached Matt asking if he’d like to upgrade to business class, assuming he had purchased their tickets, the woman quickly intervened.

Seeing as she bought the tickets and took on the unexpected responsibility of caring for Matt’s son, she took the business class upgrade for herself.

“Before he could say anything, I … mentioned it was me who bought the tickets and used my own account to pay for them, so an upgrade should go to me,” the woman wrote. “The flight attendant was trying to argue at first as she assumed Alex was my child, but I told her that's not the case and ended up having an upgrade so I can relax after spending all this time looking after Alex.”


This only seems fair, considering the money and energy she put into their trip, especially following the downfall of their relationship.

@soreece 🤔 The #1 reason some women put themselves last is because society has sold them the idea that it's SELFISH to prioritize their health, happiness and well-being over anyone else's. Please stop that ish! ✨ follow @soreece for more Prioritize your well-being & you likely avoid burnout & resentment - especially if it's not reciprocated. You're also better equipped to extend additional energy to those you love by taking better care of yourself because you already have the sustenance you need. 💜 ✌️Ever heard the phrase: You can't give from an empty cup? It simply means that when you are operating on EMPTY you have nothing more to someone give else, let alone yourself!!! ☕One of my favorite Iyanla sayings is: "what's IN the cup is for ME, and what comes OUT of the cup is for YOU ..." 👉 In other words, GIVE from the OVERFLOW, Sis! --------------------- ✨How will you FILL YOUR CUP this week & prioritize your well-being?✨  --------------------- 💾 Save & Share with someone you care about! 💜 #healthiswealth #goalsforwomenover40 #successcoach #accountabilitycoach ♬ On My Mama (Official Sound) - Victoria Monét

Passengers made inaccurate assumptions about the woman following the incident, assuming she was the boy’s mom. They didn't know the details of the situation, yet they judged her for prioritizing her needs after a stressful trip that was initially supposed to be a bonding experience for her and her boyfriend.

Even if she was Alex’s mom, would passengers and flight attendants have reacted the same way if Matt left her to look after their kid in coach while he enjoyed a business class flight?


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Reddit users raised the same questions, pointing out an alarming trend of double standards between moms and dads.

“Paying for a flight, in a breakup, taking care of a child on YOUR vacation. You by no means are the [AH],” someone emphasized in the comments. “The audacity of the ex is unbelievable. It just pisses me off so much that I can't even begin to imagine your frustration.”

“The flight attendant is an AH, too,” another person expressed. “Why would it be OK to leave the mom with the kid but not the dad? Why did they not first offer to the person who bought the tickets, as that's where the priority should've been?”

"Even if OP had been the biological mother and had not paid for the tickets, why in the world would she not be entitled to the upgrade, and why would anyone have thought she was an AH for wanting a break?" someone else pointed out. "Why would the man be given a free pass automatically from childcare duties?"


The public tends to place much more harsh expectations on women than on men.

In relationships, moms often take on most, if not all, of their kids' responsibilities while their husbands mindlessly relax and kick their feet up, especially when it comes to vacations.

While there is a rising awareness of this unfair family dynamic, people continue to condemn women for choosing to prioritize their personal needs. However, let’s be real, we all know a woman who desperately needs to rest.

Meanwhile, men get away with this all the time, yet there isn’t nearly as much outrage despite their selfishness.


Women deserve to have breaks! After this poor woman experienced what many would consider a traumatic vacation experience, she remained strong and knew her worth. 

Rather than staying silent, she took her opportunity to relax away from her seemingly self-serving ex-boyfriend, which is more than many other women would do. We should be honoring this woman for her ability to stand up for herself in the face of invalidation, despite what others had to say about it.

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Francesca Duarte is a writer on YourTango's news and entertainment team based in Orlando, FL. She covers lifestyle, human-interest, adventure, and spirituality topics.