Wedding Guests ‘Offended’ By Seating Chart Leave Before The Reception
Some people don't know etiquette.
shulers | Shutterstock Have you ever met someone you just cannot make happy? Some people seem petty by nature, always looking for a reason to complain or cause a scene. The worst part is that they will even do it on special occasions. On Reddit, one husband shared a wedding shaming story about guests who were upset over the smallest detail: the seating chart.
In an unbelievably disrespectful move, they left without saying a word, simply because they did not like their assigned table. Ask any couple planning a wedding, and they will tell you that the seating chart is the hardest part of planning. At the end of the day, you can't make everyone happy, but most guests, you hope, are able to look past where their table is and just enjoy the fun.
A couple decided to leave a wedding after the cocktail hour because they didn't like where they were seated.
“When my wife and I were planning our wedding,” the husband wrote, “we spent a lot of time deciding where guests would sit and who they would be seated with.” He explained that they wanted everyone to feel comfortable and able to socialize during the event.
The couple worked closely with their parents, since many of the guests were friends and family. They hoped people would meet each other and get along. But, as every couple soon learns, there's no such thing as making all the guests happy, and this couple was no exception.
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The wedding took place, and a few weeks later, they began going through the photos. The husband mentioned to his mom, “I don’t seem to see any photos of Lady A and Husband A at the reception, but they are clearly there during the ceremony.” That was when his mom broke the news.
Lady A, whom his mom had known since childhood, had called to say that she and her husband were offended by their seating arrangement and the people at their table. They left the wedding after the cocktail hour. “We had put them at a table with friends of theirs,” the husband wrote, “and with people we thought they would get along with professionally.” He added that both his parents and his in-laws have many siblings, so Lady A and her husband simply would not have fit at those tables.
People thought leaving early was disrespectful.
“All of that for exactly one hour of sitting,” one user wrote. Most commenters agreed that the couple’s reaction was unfair. “Some people go through life being offended by the most inane things,” another said. A third added, “Some people just love to be miserable, and nothing you do will change it.”
To better understand when it is acceptable to leave a wedding and whether this couple was wrong to leave when they did, we can look at what an etiquette expert has to say. Myka Meier, founder of the consultancy Beaumont Etiquette and author of "Modern Etiquette Made Easy," explained the concept in an article by Brides.com.
“A traditional guideline is to not leave a wedding early,” she said. “If you must, be sure to wait until at least all the main parts of the reception are over, such as the dinner, all the speeches, first dances, and cutting of the cake.” In this case, the couple left after cocktail hour, which was before the reception even started.
On top of that, talking to people you may not know at a wedding is not that hard. First, people are usually a bit tipsy and happy after cocktail hour. Second, guests are enjoying themselves because it is a party. A Reddit user even made a list of conversation starters for situations like this: how do they know the couple, what do they do, where are they from, have they been to a wedding before, what food they picked, how they like the food, how great the speeches were, how nice the ceremony was, and more.
You can't please everyone, and that's okay.
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Planning a wedding is hard work. There are a lot of moving parts and a lot of guests to consider. While it's admirable to want to prioritize a wonderful experience for the loved ones you've invited, sometimes it's not always easy to do. This newlywed couple is the perfect example of that.
Sure, this couple did not handle the situation well at all, but as long as the bride and groom enjoyed themselves, that's all that matters. Someone will always find something to complain about. Better that the couple left rather than bring down the mood at the table for everyone else. See, there's always a silver lining.
Matt Machado is a writer studying journalism at the University of Central Florida. He covers relationships, psychology, celebrities, pop culture, and human interest topics.
