Stressed-Out People Do 3 Things In Their Car That People With No Worries In Life Wouldn’t Understand
Budimir Jevtic | Shutterstock For many people, their car is an extension of their home. It's a safe space to collect thoughts, belt out favorite tunes, have a good cry, or simply decompress.
From the snacks hidden in the center console to the cozy blanket in the backseat, a car is often a reflection of its owner. And with it comes the comforts said owner might need in their home away from home. A stressed owner certainly might have different needs than an owner with no worries, because stressed-out people use their safe-haven cars for different reasons.
My old routine gave me anxiety about being tardy to my own life, as soon as my classes or shifts were over. I only broke this pattern when an ex-partner asked me why that was an expectation for me. I made connections and distinctions between what my schedule was and what I wanted my routine to be. I realized I needed a gap of time to sit between the lives that I controlled. Guess where I took that gap of time?
Stressed-out people do 3 things in their car that people with no worries wouldn't understand:
1. Fill the car with sound
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One Reddit user who uses their car as a safe space revealed their routine: "Sit there and think or listen to music / podcasts / YouTube / whatever. Sometimes you just need to temporarily end up somewhere less stressful than life." Another shared, "Before I lived alone, my car was where I cried, jammed, watched funny videos that were loud, and decompressed after a hard day. I live alone (with an 85 lb German Shepard) now and can do those things at home, but I still find myself retreating to my car sometimes because it’s comfortable. Where your safe space is matters less, I think than having one."
My car allows me time to play the music on my stereo or in my head, ranging from Billie Holiday to Tame Impala to Jason Derulo. Any song chosen, you will be "Ridin’ Solo," "Bliss[fully] in your Solitude." Its solemnity transitions for me into reflection about my day, yesterday's, and the people I have and had. My intention in reminiscence is meant to calm me down and heal the fissures in my thick skin, soothing myself and the words in my head toward healthiness, tomorrow, and the street’s cement.
There's a scientific reason why blasting your favorite music in the car is so appealing. It's literally mood-changing. Whether you blast a sad song to have a good cry and let out pent-up emotions or sing joyously to your guilty-pleasure pop songs, singing loud and proud, as if you were the main act in a concert, feels good.
From reducing stress to fighting depression, singing in the car has countless benefits. As music therapist Lyndie Walker told WCCO News, "Music activates every part of your brain." She added, "We can process emotions so much through music. You think about the lyrics that you're singing and how it makes you feel on the inside, but really it's the physical act of doing it."
2. Sit in complete silence and just breathe
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If you need to sit in the car in complete silence, even just for a few moments, to decompress, whether you realize it or not, you're meditating. Getting to know your breath, your thoughts, and the memories you replay makes the silence a place for mindfulness.
“Sitting in your car serves as a transitional space — a haven that exists between the outside world and home,” psychotherapist Jessica Hunt explained to Good Morning Utah. “It’s a moment to decompress, process the day, and mentally prepare for what’s next.”
Having your own space is necessary. A public street is a “third place,” described by UChicago as a space with the potential to interact with community members that nurture your self-chosen identities, i.e., a solo walk. However, sometimes a walk isn’t what you need. Street parking is a portion of a bubbled third space that could accommodate other members, but when needed, it serves as a place to rest and reset.
In an essay for Business Insider, busy mom Jamie Davis Smith confessed, "Occasionally, I sit in the car letting a great song finish playing, or taking sips of still-hot coffee in a to-go cup before I start tackling my never-ending to-do list. On particularly stressful days, I just close my eyes and breathe deeply."
3. Take a nap
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According to a survey by Talker Research on behalf of Ziebart, Gen Zers specifically enjoy using their car as a safe haven for self-care. In fact, 25% of the cohort surveyed said their car is the perfect place for a power nap when life simply feels like too much. Everyone needs to enjoy the sanctity of space and well-being apart from the other members in their lives, and sometimes the car is the only place to do that.
A Reddit user agreed saying, "I even used to take naps in my car after work even though I had an apartment (with roommates and a girlfriend) to go home to. We all need that space." These personal mini-breaks help eliminate the clouded haze of fatigue, both mentally and physically, and are meant to be tailored to you because they are for you.
There are no clear instructions or a perfect way to take a break, but the more you take them, no matter how long or short, you will figure out what flows after your motor stops. Psychotherapist Jessica Hunt shared, "It might be a sign that you need more intentional downtime or stress management in your routine." As long as you get that downtime, it really doesn't matter if it's in a car or a bookshop, as long as it suits your needs.
By prioritizing our personal spaces, we can appreciate our third, work, and living spaces for any and all fragments of quality time. Turns out, those stressed-out people who find a safe haven in their cars could teach those folks without a care in the world a thing or two.
Emi Magaña is a writer from Los Angeles with a bachelor's in English. She covers entertainment, news, and the real human experience. More of her non-fiction essays belong to CHAPSTICK online magazine and her Substack.
