6 Things Socially Intelligent Men Do Differently The Second They Enter A Room
They know how to read the vibe and make others feel at ease.
Andrea Piacquadio | Canva Women are waiting to be swept off their feet by the right man who knows social etiquette and can read the signs, knowing when to advance and when to back off. When you approach a woman like a gentleman, she will be receptive and curious.
You leave her with a sense of mystery, which compels her to know more and leaves her with a smile on her face. To be a socially intelligent man, you also have to be able to lead yourself and be open to rejection. Without leading yourself, you won’t be able to lead others, and you will never get what you want because you are always going to be waiting for someone else to permit you.
For guys who only want to learn techniques on being more socially intelligent, this is not for you. Quick fixes and not focusing on the big picture will get you limited results.
Here are 6 things socially intelligent men do differently the second they enter a room:
1. They don't pretend to be anyone they're not
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Pretending to be something you’re not is a great way to repel women. Being real means you’re vulnerable and exposing yourself, showing who you really are. Many men don’t want to do this because if they get rejected, they won’t have a scapegoat to dull the emotional blow to their ego.
Authentic behavior is the foundation for trust and facilitates deeper relationships built on honesty and mutual respect. A 2021 study explained that authentic people are perceived as genuine and trustworthy, which is a significant factor in building and maintaining social bonds.
2. They don't speak in hushed tones
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As a man, you want to be heard, so speak up — clearly and respectfully. One of the creepiest things is when a man talks to a woman and automatically lowers the volume of his voice to a whisper, giving off a weird vibe and exposing his lack of confidence.
While research has suggested gender differences in assertive communication styles, with men being perceived as more assertive, it's important to acknowledge that assertiveness is a learned skill that can be developed regardless of gender. The ability to express opinions, needs, and rights respectfully, known as assertiveness, is a key component of effective communication and social skills.
3. They show genuine interest
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Don’t talk about yourself; talk about her. It’s a simple concept, but so many guys still ask, “What do I talk about?”
Show interest in her, and your conversation topic will be taken care of. You will learn about your prospective partner, and they will appreciate your interest.
The way interest is shown can significantly impact how it's perceived. A 2023 study explained that the social setting and cultural norms play a significant role in how expressions of interest are received and interpreted.
4. They speak like a gentleman
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A gentleman speaks in an educated vocabulary and tone of voice. His words flow, and his voice is soothing, deep, and relaxed. You don’t need to attend an Ivy League school to master this; you just need to read a lot and practice speaking slowly.
Effective social communication involves using appropriate language, understanding social norms, and interpreting nonverbal cues. Research also indicates that men tend to speak more abstractly than women, and this can be associated with perceptions of power and leadership in some contexts.
5. They express confidence
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Men with high social and emotional intelligence express confidence not through dominance, but through empathy and self-regulation. Research has shown that this indicates that this grounded approach builds stronger social connections and more effective leadership.
This means not running away from challenges and facing your fears. How you really feel about yourself will come out in your personality and behaviors. Take on your greatest fears to build yourself into a confident man. It’s much easier to appear confident when you actually are.
6. They approach people with class
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No one likes a sleazy pick-up line; when you go talk to women, do so as a gentleman. Be upfront, direct, and tactful.
A gentleman doesn’t use some technique or line just because he read a cheesy book that told him it works. This is where your foundation as a man will form.
While classic chivalrous acts are still appreciated, modern chivalry emphasizes demonstrating respect by showing up on time and being present and attentive on dates. Men who lead with emotional intelligence, ask thoughtful questions, and value relational safety are increasingly valued in dating, according to a 2022 study.
If you're lying and deceitful, then you need to work on yourself first. Create a blueprint for your life based on who you really want to be and stick to it. Values don’t count if they’re just an afterthought.
Eddy Baller is a dating & personal development coach who specializes in building confidence, and overcoming shyness.
