9 Signs You Have A Very Low-Quality Person In Your Life
This is not the kind of person you want around.
Krakenimages.com | Shutterstock The people you surround yourself with matter more than you think. According to research, negative relationships predict poorer well-being.
But with that being said, picking out the rotten apples isn't always easy. In fact, at first you may not recognize the signs of a low-quality person in your life. Luckily, there are specific indications that point to a not-so-great individual.
Here are 9 signs you have a low-quality person in your life
1. They have no respect for your boundaries
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Most, if not all people, have unspoken boundaries that shouldn't be crossed. Yet, if someone constantly infringes on your boundaries, it can mean they don't understand your boundaries, or they simply don't care about respecting them.
According to the New Hope Mental Health Counseling Services, poor boundaries lead to burnout and exhaustion. Your suffering isn't worth their comfort, and burnout leads to worsening physical and mental health.
So, cutting off someone who doesn't respect your boundaries is the best way to remove these low-quality individuals from your life.
2. They have zero empathy
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According to research, empathy plays a significant role in the expression of needs, desires, connections, and the sharing of experiences. This is why it's important to have people in your life who can empathize and connect with you, even if they don't understand the situation completely.
But what happens if you feel misunderstood because they lack empathy? One study found that feeling misunderstood leads to higher stress levels, lower life satisfaction, lower motivation, and less healthy cortisol levels.
If you have someone in your life who can't empathize with you, it's best to cut them off. Not only are they a low-quality person, but they're also a hazard to your health.
3. They refuse to take accountability for their actions
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It's never a good sign if someone in your life refuses to take accountability for their actions, and it can indicate that they aren't a high-quality individual.
According to licensed counselor Dr. Raheem Lay, LCSW-S, EIC, people who refuse to take accountability do so for many reasons.
For some, it has to do with the fear of failure. Admitting that they failed is equivalent to admitting that they messed up, instilling a fear of judgment. For others, it has to do with their bad habit of shifting blame. They aren't self-aware so they unconsciously shift blame to avoid the consequences of their actions.
Regardless, people who refuse to take responsibility haven't matured enough, making them people you should avoid at all costs.
4. They're extremely critical
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Criticism isn't always a bad thing, but like anything in life, there's a need for balance.
Unfortunately, those who criticize others don't understand this balance and will go to unimaginable lengths to prove a point or knock you down a peg. Though it might not seem serious, criticism should not be taken lightly.
Research finds that criticism can be hurtful if the other person perceives it that way, and if someone is constantly attacking you, you'll likely view it as upsetting. The same study also determined that people are more vulnerable to mental health illness the more criticism they receive.
Distance yourself from low-quality people like this. After all, you wouldn't want to harm your mental health or your relationship with others.
5. They belittle your achievements
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Accomplishing important milestones is a great feat anyone should be proud of. But if you have a low-quality person in your life, don't be surprised if they make your achievements feel insignificant.
People who belittle others do so because they feel self-conscious about themselves and their achievements. Counselor Araya Baker, M.Phil.Ed. adds that an envious person who can't find flaws will "humble" you to decrease your likability, even if it's untrue, biased, or irrelevant.
Steer clear of people who don't celebrate your wins. These individuals unfortunately don't have your best interests at heart.
6. They break promises
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Anyone with friends would like to think they can depend on their bestie's word. But people who constantly break promises aren't dependable and shouldn't be trusted. Not only are they low-quality individuals, they're also actively harming and betraying your trust.
Studies have shown that a betrayal of trust leads to shock, loss, grief, anger, self-doubt, and lower self-esteem. All of this combined can impact your mental health for the worse.
So, don't feel too bad if you find yourself distancing yourself from people who don't follow through on promises or break your trust. True friends will never leave you behind, no matter what.
7. They constantly lie
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It's hard to trust someone who lies to your face. Regardless of their intentions, lying is something emotionally immature people do when they can't express their inner thoughts. As you can imagine, it makes for a low-quality person.
Lying is also a relationship destroyer but, according to studies, lying actually confuses the liar, making them less confident of the truth.
If someone in your life is lying to you, confront them head-on. Find a way to work through it together or cut them off completely. Either way, be sure to put yourself first.
8. They only care about themselves
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Low-quality people are incredibly selfish and only care about themselves.
If you're going through a tough time, their problems matter more than your own. And as time goes on, it can make anyone feel alone, impacting your mental health negatively.
To avoid this, be sure that the conversations with your friends are on equal footing. If you find yourself silent 24/7 while your friends ramble on about their own issues, think about the damage this person is doing to your sense of self.
9. They stir up drama because they're bored
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If someone in your life enjoys starting drama because they're bored and have nothing better to do, it indicates they are a low-quality person.
Though it might feel like fun and games, someone causing unnecessary drama can deplete you. And because you're on high alert or overly stressed, you might find yourself feeling burned out, which can lead to anxiety, depression, and anger.
Don't allow someone to remain in your life if they can't give you basic respect. You likely have enough to worry about and don't need a drama queen adding chaos.
Marielisa Reyes is a writer with a bachelor's in psychology who covers self-help, relationships, career, family, and astrology topics.