If A Person Can Be Fully Trusted, They'll Do 6 Things Repeatedly
Adrian Swancar | Unsplash I come across many people who are frustrated with the effect they seem to have (and lack thereof) on other people. They want to grow their businesses, resonate, connect, sell things, and make an impact. But one thing we can miss at this level of influence is trust.
We're continually telegraphing our intentions consciously and subconsciously, and people often make quick judgments based on our actions. Whether we can influence another person or not depends on how much they fully trust us. If a person's trust in you is lacking, they won't stick around long. Here's what to do if you want to develop more trusting relationships, whether it's friends, family, or colleagues, as well as how to know if you can fully trust a person.
If someone can be trusted, you'll see them do these six things repeatedly:
1. A trusted person follows through on their promises
Far too many people undermine the importance of doing what they said they would do. This is not only vital in instilling trust in others, but it also strengthens your identity as someone responsible and who can be counted on.
A 2023 study confirmed that consistency is a top predictor of trust, as people obviously tend to trust more those whose actions align with their words. Sometimes it may seem trivial to follow through on something that doesn't hold much meaning to you, but every little thing you do is felt and seen in some way in the world.
If you continually fail to follow through with what you said you'd do, whether it's not showing up, saying you'll make plans (and then never making them), or forgetting to pay someone back, people will inevitably lose faith in you.
2. They think about others instead of being consumed with themselves
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If you're continually focused on how you come across, this simply reflects one thing: you aren't thinking about others. When our life strategy is one-sided, obsessive self-preservation, others will sense it. Would you trust someone who can only think about themselves?
3. They pause before reacting
If you're triggered by something or someone and react emotionally or irrationally, this shows emotional immaturity. We're talking about the difference a few seconds make. Learn to create the tiniest gap in your headspace so you don't react from an emotional space that you'll regret later. People lose trust in anyone who doesn't have a handle on their emotions.
4. They tell the truth, even when it's uncomfortable
Sometimes we tell little white lies to be tactful in social situations so we don't unnecessarily hurt others; this reflects one's social intelligence. But most forms of lying, especially when discovered by the person being lied to, will significantly damage a relationship and one's trust. Lying is a no-brainer on this list. Honesty is so refreshing. Even if the truth is painful, people will trust your word if you always give it to them straight.
5. They don't assume
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When we make assumptions, we act on incomplete information. We do this out of impatience and a lack of emotional maturity (notice a common thread forming?). Assuming things are fine (or terrible) is risky and reckless. If we turn out of a T-junction, assuming there are no other cars, we risk a collision. When we live like this, we diminish our trust in ourselves, and others will lose faith in us, too.
6. Trusted people take responsibility for their choices
Have you ever come across that person who just cannot seem to take responsibility for anything they do? How trustworthy do they seem to you? There is a direct link between one's propensity to assign blame to others and the trust they instill in others. Why? Because a failure to assume responsibility for one's poor judgments always comes from a place of insecurity. Insecure people are often prone to making poor decisions, and many are quick to save themselves before handing a life preserver to anyone else.
When you can't meet an expectation, take accountability. When you royally mess something up, take accountability. Don't pass the buck. Trust happens when other people see you willing to look bad or have an uncomfortable conversation if it means getting to the truth. When someone admits to past mistakes, it instills trust and a sense that that person is accountable, even if it reflects poorly on them. Leaders who take risks and are willing to face criticism have the most loyal followers.
If I can leave you with one piece of advice on trust that has helped me over the years and that I return to often, it's this: We're all connected. When you help and support others, they will want to help and support you in return. You can't just say you're trustworthy; you gotta show it. Walk the walk; don't just talk the talk.
Alex Mathers is a writer and coach who helps you build a money-making personal brand with your knowledge and skills while staying mentally resilient.
