To The Friends You Will Always Love But Grew Apart From

We may not stay in touch with them, but it doesn't mean that we will ever forget them.

two women friends Dima Aslanian / Shutterstock

By Samantha Walisundara

My life has always been chaotic and crazy. From a time I can remember, there hasn’t truly been what you can call a “lazy” day for me.

My days are typically booked with working out, studying, writing, and my family. And the time I carve out for socializing tends to become less and less as I grow older.

With the increasing stress from responsibilities I face and the pressures of “adulting,” my social circle has dwindled quite greatly compared to what it was in high school.


Looking back fondly, I remember how nice it was to be around the same people, and know that you could always be there for each other. It was nice to just hop into a car and go out for lunch or an early dinner.

My favorite memories from my senior year are the ones spent in our cars in the senior lot just hanging out and having a good time.

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I had made some of my best friends back then, but as we’ve grown older and busier, the friendships too have grown more distant. It is a sad reality, but a reality nonetheless.

Truthfully I am the kind of person that doesn’t really cling on to her phone all the time. I’m an awful texter, usually because I’ll read a message with the intent of replying but then get dragged into something else and completely forget about it altogether.

As I’ve begun to find myself through college and all that it entails, I’ve realized that I’m much more of an introvert than I thought. I love my time alone, and it’s what I look forward to the most after a long day.

But I’m also extroverted in the sense that I interact with underclassmen every day and am constantly pushed to step out of my comfort zone as an RA.


When we all stepped off that stage in high school, diploma in hand, and smiles up to our ears, we all made the promise to stay in touch. Three years after graduating, I realized something I took for granted back in high school: how effortless staying in touch was when we all lived within the same city.

The friends I made in high school are now all spread across the country and keeping in touch has become close to impossible for me.

People constantly come and go from our lives, but that doesn’t mean they don’t leave an imprint on us, in whatever form that may be.

Some people stay and show us how unconditional love is, and prove that whatever may come, you will always be close to them. Some will end up leaving, not because anyone is at fault, but because the honest truth is that people change.


We may not stay in touch with them, but it doesn’t mean that we will ever forget them.

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To my friends who don't hear from me often and to my friends who I may have grown apart from, know that I still care about you. Know that I will always be your friend despite how often we talk or not. Despite the distance that is between us, I will always be here for you to lean on.

There are many moments where I wonder how you’re doing, hoping that life is giving you everything you deserve and more. And even more, moments where I miss you.

Thank you for the love and laughter you’ve brought into my life over the years. For the structure, you gave me in my time of chaos.


Thank you for helping me grow so much, from that tiny insecure freshman to a powerful and confident college student.

But most of all, I’m sorry that I’m awful at balancing my time and putting in the effort to keep you a part of my life. Time is such a precious gift; it is one of the greatest gifts anyone can give. But that doesn’t mean I care any less.

I will always be here for you, so please don’t be afraid to reach out if you ever need me. I never meant for our friendship to fade away, it was never intentional, but just the sad reality that our lives no longer overlap.

You have and always will be very important to me. Our friendship, as cheesy as this may sound, is a huge part of what has made me who I am today.


And I know deep down, that whatever you end up doing in life, you will be extremely successful in. You are a force to be reckoned with, and there is truly no one like you. You are irreplaceable.

Maybe someday in the future, we will reconnect, and it will be just like old times. We’ll pick up where we left off, and it will seem like nothing has changed.

So until then, thank you for everything.


And know that I love you and will always be somewhere out there, wishing you the best, and hoping that you’re remembering the memories we’ve shared, just as fondly as I am right now.

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Samantha Walisundara is a writer and contributor to Unwritten whose work has also appeared in Thought Catalog and Collective World.