The 30-Second Test That Can Immediately Size Up A Person's True Character
This test can help you determine if you want to be around someone in a matter of seconds.
G-Stock Studio / Shutterstock It’s natural to wonder what someone’s true character is. As you meet people, you only have a brief amount of time to get to know who they really are. At least one person believes that’s plenty.
A confidence coach thinks she can teach you how to determine the kind of character a person has within seconds.
Laura Eiman is a confidence coach who won a gold medal at the Olympics in weightlifting at the age of 64. On her website, Eiman said, “I coach women how to win, how to have invincible confidence in themselves, and a never quit attitude by changing their thoughts and beliefs about ourselves and the world around them.”
Eiman is popular on TikTok, with over 50,000 followers on the app, where she goes by the username @confidencecoachforwomen. She recently shared “a tip I’ve been using for decades” to teach people how to quickly size up the character of others.
“Ask yourself this one question about them,” she said. “Does this person want to be right all the time, or does this person want to be happy all the time?”
Eiman’s method is simple and can work in a variety of situations. She suggested applying it to things like first dates and job interviews. Instances when you are meeting someone for the first time and don’t have long to learn about them.
“Ask yourself this question after your date, or after your job interview,” she stated. “It will give you a clear indication as to what this person’s character is like.”
A person who wants to be right all the time is not the kind of person you want to be around.
Eiman offered some sage advice regarding which kind of person you should seek to surround yourself with. “I stay away from people who want to be right all the time,” she said. “They’re kind of narcissistic. The world revolves around them. They’re always playing the blame game on you. They’re never taking responsibility. Who wants to be around them?”
If a person wants to be right all the time, chances are they are most concerned with themself. After all, being right all the time really only benefits the person who is right.
Psychology Today dove deeper into how the "blame game" affects relationships. “Problems arise when you are involved in a heated debate with someone who is a pro at blaming others — and individuals who always need to be right have likely mastered this skill.”
“Recognizing ahead of time that they will probably try to blame you, or at a minimum avoid taking responsibility for their own words or actions, can remove some of the sting when it actually happens.”
Not everyone is on board with Laura Eiman’s method for sizing up a person's character.
A look at the comments section on Eiman’s video showed a pretty sharp divide between her and other TikTok users. “Kind of a broad assumption,” one person wrote. “I wanna be happy, and I’m only happy when I’m right,” another said. A third person chimed in and said, “I stay away from both! It’s impossible to do either.”
However, other commenters agreed with Eiman and appreciated her tips. “I like this lady!” someone wrote. Another person expressed their gratitude to Eiman and said, “Thanks for the newfound way of making friends.” “She’s on point,” a third person said.
While some may think that Eiman’s advice is too easy, or, at least, too general, it’s not a bad idea to consider what is most important to a person when deciding what you want your association to be with them moving forward. Even if that means determining quickly whether they are a blamer or not.
Just be careful when making a 30-second judgment — you might not be right all the time!
Mary-Faith Martinez is a writer for YourTango who covers entertainment, news and human interest topics.