People Who Are Often Misunderstood For Being 'Too Quiet' Actually Have These 11 Authentic Personality Traits
iaginzburg / Shutterstock In our society, being extroverted often gets more praise and positive feedback than having introverted, quiet habits. We’ve been socialized to appreciate loud confidence, leaving many introverted people feeling chronically misunderstood for being quieter and more appreciative of their alone time.
While society might have misguided norms and expectations that introverts find stifling, people who are often misunderstood for being “too quiet” often have authentic personality traits that lead to better connections and more thoughtful behavior. They not only develop better relationships through those social interactions they do make space for, but they’re also more reflective and analytical in environments like the workplace.
People who are often misunderstood for being ‘too quiet’ actually have these 10 authentic personality traits
1. They’re incredibly reflective
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Whether it stems from self-awareness or a sense of intentionality, people who are often misunderstood for being “too quiet” are often more reflective than the average extrovert. They aren’t isolating themselves out of shyness, but rather to appreciate the quiet they need to reflect on behaviors and to think deeply about things without distractions.
Of course, this also means that they’re more self-aware and authentic in their own personal lives. They not only acknowledge their patterns of behaviors and emotions, as a study published in Europe’s Journal of Psychology suggests, but they also accept them and take action based on what they’ve learned.
2. They’re observant
Even if being an observant person means spending more time alone and appreciating quietness, which is largely misunderstood in our society, experts suggest that the more observant a person is, the more creative, intelligent, and empathetic they are. They’re not caught up in their own needs and desires all the time, but are intentional about noticing the energy, people, and environments around them.
They notice things that extraverted, loud, and overconfident people tend to miss when they’re taking up space, and can make judgments and think deeply about things with that big-picture perspective in mind.
3. They’re thoughtful
Despite having smaller social circles and a tendency to be less talkative in group conversations, quiet, introverted people do still enjoy social interactions. They have to be well-thought-out to protect their social battery, but that doesn’t mean they’re isolated without any kind of social joy.
People who are misunderstood for being “too quiet” actually have authentic personality traits like thoughtfulness. If they show up somewhere or place themselves in a room with others, you can trust that it’s an intentional action, rather than a means to seek attention or validation.
4. They’re great listeners
People who are secure in their own identity and authentic around other people may also be the quietest in a conversation or social interaction. They don’t need to chase validation by interrupting others or trying to be the center of attention, so they often stay quiet, actively listening and making space for other people to feel heard.
That’s why introverted, quiet people are often anomalies in a “world that can’t stop talking.” They know how to be quiet and listen to others, which often makes people feel heard in important ways. They can process information, regulate their own emotions, and brainstorm solutions to problems, all without needing to speak or fight for space in conversations.
They don’t need other people to reassure them that they’re making the right decisions or talking correctly, so quietness is perfectly comfortable and beneficial for their understanding in social situations.
5. They’re comfortable with silence
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Part of the reason why introverted people tend to be easier to connect with in one-on-one conversations is that they’re comfortable with silence. Whether that manifests in an appreciation for alone time or a proclivity toward active listening, it’s often the people who are misunderstood for being “too quiet” that use silence to their advantage.
It’s no surprise that in our loud, extrovert-praising society, quietness is misjudged and misinterpreted as awkward, but for authentic introverts, silence is a superpower, both in social interactions and amid solitude.
6. They’re imaginative
Considering so many creative processes and imaginative authenticity stems from a strong relationship with yourself and an appreciation for solitude, it’s not surprising that people who are often misunderstood for being “too quiet” actually have these authentic personality traits.
Introverted people are more creatively inclined because they appreciate their own company and often have a fondness for solitude that allows them to dive into creative hobbies and everyday habits. They’re imaginative because they don’t run from quietness and aren’t distracted by a need to be reassured or validated by other people in conversations and social interactions.
7. They’re effortlessly calm
People who appreciate alone time and use it to their advantage often experience greater overall well-being in their daily lives. Their nervous system has a calming baseline, their mental health is thoughtfully cared for through intentional habits, and they’re not yearning for validation from others in superficial social interactions.
People who are often misunderstood for being “too quiet” actually have this authentic personality trait that loud, overconfident people lack. They’re misunderstood, but with the right meaningful relationships and daily habits, their quietness is a superpower and a healthy ritual.
8. They’re curious
Despite often being overstimulated easily, as a study published in Personality and Individual Differences explains, introverted, quiet people are still naturally curious about novelty, media, and art. They can appreciate new music and step out of their comfort zone, in moderation, allowing them to truly appreciate novelty without constant expectation or validation.
Their curiosity doesn’t just feed their intelligence, but it also feeds their sense of authenticity. They can truly be themselves by curiously exploring things and ideas that interest them, rather than trying to appease others by chasing trends.
9. They’re independent
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According to the author of “Quiet: The Power Of Introverts,” Susan Cain, quiet, introverted people often prefer to think things through and ponder deep questions on their own time, whereas their extroverted counterparts do their best processing out loud or with other people.
So, while someone’s quietness in a conversation might be misunderstood as disengagement, chances are they’re actually just thinking about and unpacking what they’re hearing. They’re independent by nature, which is why solitude and quietness, both of which reconnect them to their most authentic selves, are so powerful and profound.
10. They’re careful about relationships
Many introverted, quiet people are careful about who they let into their lives and whom they trust. Considering they’re easily drained by small talk and superficiality, they need to nurture relationships with more depth to protect themselves from missing out on the joy of social connection in their everyday lives.
People who are often misunderstood for being “too quiet” actually have these authentic personality traits. They’re careful, intentional, and thoughtful about relationships and interactions, not because they’re “picky” or “rude,” but because they care a lot about depth when it comes to connection.
11. They’re self-assured
Many people misinterpret an introverted, quiet person’s self-assuredness as standoffishness, according to marriage and family therapist Blake Griffin Edwards. When they’re reclusive or quiet during social interactions, they’re not trying to express that they’re better than everyone else. They’re just leaning into introverted thinking patterns that allow them to reconnect with themselves.
They need space for internal processes and reflection, because while others might seek validation and reassurance from others to feel confident, introverted people only need internal security and assuredness.
Zayda Slabbekoorn is a senior editorial strategist with a bachelor’s degree in social relations & policy and gender studies who focuses on psychology, relationships, self-help, and human interest stories.
