Newlyweds No Longer Speaking To Each Other Because Husband Refuses To Pay For Entire Honeymoon
He argued that if his wife can't afford to contribute to the honeymoon, then they shouldn't go at all.
Krakenimages.com | Shutterstock A newlywed couple has found themselves experiencing their first marital bump after not being able to reach an agreement about booking their upcoming honeymoon. Posting on Reddit, the 28-year-old husband claimed that he and his wife are currently not speaking to each other after he refused to pay for both of their flights to Bali.
The first year of marriage isn't easy. Even if you've dated for years, there's something about tying the knot that makes things a little bit more difficult. Seven months in, that's exactly what these newlyweds are experiencing. The celebration of their union, their honeymoon, has caused major conflict, and unsurprisingly, it's about money.
A newlywed couple is no longer speaking to each other because the husband refuses to pay for the entire honeymoon trip.
"We both work & have a joint account for house bills & investments, [the]rest stays in our respective personal accounts for individual use & control. We earn roughly the same but I end up saving around $1500 while she barely saves anything, as she over consumes unnecessary and 'cute' Instagram products," the husband began in his post.
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He explained that he and his wife have been together for over five years and were married seven months ago. Since their wedding, the two have been planning their honeymoon trip to Bali.
After finding a decent deal on flights and a hotel, he suggested that they book it right away before the price increased. He told his wife that she should book his ticket and he would book hers, but she was adamant that he should just pay for both and she would pay him back later. "Her idea isn't bad, but. I believe that things like marriage, honeymoon, travel, and kids planning should only be done when you're financially ready. So I declined the offer and told her to wait," he continued.
His wife accused him of being 'greedy' by not buying both tickets.
It wasn't long before the two ended up in a heated argument, with his wife arguing that he shouldn't care so much about money when they were trying to make these memories together. She even went so far as to say that it was his job as her husband to at least take care of the entire trip and not have her deplete her own meager savings.
He admitted that the two of them weren't speaking, and their honeymoon had been put on hold as they attempted to work through their issues. Honeymoons aren't cheap, especially for couples who have just shelled out thousands for their wedding. But the argument isn't really about the honeymoon and who can afford it. It's really about financial compatibility.
As one commenter noted, "You and your wife are not fiscally compatible - unless she or you are willing to compromise: you take the role of breadwinner, or she takes the role of an equitable financial partner. Otherwise, you will spend your lives fighting about money. Been there, done that!" Another added, "you guys should have ironed out your financial stuff better before getting married! A vacation is a joint thing so that money should have also been going into your account. You guys need to figure this out because it could really mess up your relationship!"
1 in 4 married couples have identified money as their greatest relationship challenge.
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Arguing about money is nothing new when it comes to couples. In fact, Fidelity's Couples and Money 2024 study found that a whopping 45% of married couples argue about money at least "occasionally." While the occasional "we don't have the money for that right now" or "why would you buy that without talking to me first" fight isn't necessarily going to signal the end of a relationship, if those arguments happen more than occasionally, it could be cause for concern.
Finances are one of those topics that couples prefer to ignore until they can't any longer, like this newlywed couple. Fidelity's survey found that burying your head in the sand does no good because 1 in 4 couples agreed that money disagreements are their greatest relationship challenge.
This couple had five years of dating to talk about their saving versus spending personalities, and it wasn't until honeymoon planning that it came to a head. Georgina Sturmer (BACP), a U.K.-based counselor, told VeryWellMind, “Our approach to finances is often shaped by our upbringing and personal history, in the same way that our approach to relationships is shaped by these factors. If we have conflicting approaches to financial management, it can lead to anxiety, frustration, resentment, anger, mistrust, and fear.”
This husband is obviously a saver, and his wife is obviously more of a spender. That doesn't mean they can't make their relationship work. It does mean that they will have to communicate and come to a savings and budget routine that works for both of them, however. They both have to agree on a mutual goal, and they both have to stick with it. Who pays for the tickets to Bali probably wouldn't have even been an issue if they were both on the same page when it came to spending and saving.
Nia Tipton is a staff writer with a bachelor's degree in creative writing and journalism who covers news and lifestyle topics that focus on psychology, relationships, and the human experience.
