Woman Brings 8-Year-Old Son To Sister-In-Law's Child-Free Wedding And Cries When They Are Asked To Leave
Someone else's wedding day is not about what you want.
NeonShot | Shutterstock Child-free weddings remain a hot topic in today's world. While brides and grooms may not intend to hurt parents or children, their wedding day is ultimately their own, and guests should respect their choices. Still, some people don't seem to respect that.
After one woman received an invitation for a child-free wedding, she decided to bring along her 8-year-old son anyway and was appalled by the bride's reaction.
A woman cried after she and her 8-year-old son were asked to leave her sister-in-law's child-free wedding.
Sharing her story on the U.K.-based parenting forum Mumsnet, the mom revealed that she and her partner were invited to her sister-in-law's wedding. When her partner asked if the woman's 8-year-old son, whom she had shared with a previous partner, could come along, his sister declined his request, as it was a child-free wedding. "She only wanted her other brother's daughter as a bridesmaid. Her other brother's three stepchildren were not invited, the youngest of whom is thirteen," the mom wrote.
Despite her sister-in-law's initial refusal, she directly asked her if she could bring her son to the evening reception, noting that both the bride and groom knew her son and that they had all lived together for a year. Her sister-in-law once again stated that no additional guests or children were allowed at any part of the wedding.
Shunevych Serhii | Shutterstock
The woman disregarded her sister-in-law's request and brought her son to the wedding brunch.
When the wedding day arrived, the woman and her partner booked a hotel. Since her son's father could not look after him, she decided to bring him along to the hotel with them and take him to the scheduled pre-wedding brunch her sister-in-law and her groom had planned for guests.
However, when the woman arrived at the brunch, the hotel staff only had her name recorded as a guest for the event and refused to let her son in. "I refused to leave him to go to brunch to ask if he could come in," the mom shared. Even though she was still refused entry, she eventually spotted other wedding guests who attended the brunch gathering outside on the back patio. She decided to sneak in and join them.
However, when the bride spotted the little boy, she approached him and, according to the woman, "came over to my son and essentially asked him to leave, sort of gently by asking him to go out on the lawn with my partner. Partner left with us and we had breakfast in the pubic bit."
"I actually started to cry over breakfast, then my son did. I am ashamed of myself for this," the woman wrote. She admitted that while she may have been unreasonable in repeatedly asking if her son could come to a child-free wedding, she did not think bringing him to the pre-wedding brunch would be an issue. However, others were not on the same page as her.
Other people believed that the woman overstepped boundaries by bringing her son to a wedding she knew he was not invited to.
'"May I bring my son?' 'No' Don't worry I'll bring him anyway and make a scene if you don't let him in.' Everyone thinks their own children are special cases. Newsflash: they aren't," one Mumsnet user commented. "You asked if your child could come, got told no, brought him anyway and after now asking if you were unreasonable? It was very clear, especially as other nieces and nephews weren't invited. People may not agree with childfree weddings, but it is the bride and groom's choice and clearly what they wanted here," another user wrote.
"Why did you think it would be okay to come back with your son when you had been told he was not invited? The brunch was clearly for the people that had been invited to the wedding, as the bride had told you she wasn't inviting additional people to the evening part," another user noted.
The wedding guest list is up to the discretion of the bride and groom only.
Even if you may not agree with leaving children out of weddings, it is not your place as a guest to completely disrespect the bride and groom's expectations for their wedding day.
shulers | Shutterstock
Some couples want a more relaxed atmosphere that is free from children screaming and running around. Others may not have the finances to invite their guests' children. Whatever the reason may be, no one should be challenged about it on a day that is supposed to be dedicated to them, not your children.
In fact, according to Wedsite's etiquette guide for hosting a child-free wedding, this bride did everything right. They wrote, The secret to planning a seamless child-free wedding all comes down to communication! Setting expectations for your guests early and upfront is definitely the most respectful approach, and usually the most well-received. Keep in mind that parents will need to make alternative arrangements for their kids in order to join you for your special day. It’s important to be considerate of this and give them a heads-up to the adults-only nature of your wedding as soon as possible."
Not only did the bride send the invite with specific adults-only instructions, but she, in no uncertain terms, made it clear to her sister-in-law, more than once, that there were no exceptions. While you are certainly entitled to decline a wedding invitation if your kids are not welcome and you are unable to find childcare, you are not entitled to bring them somewhere they are clearly not welcome.
Megan Quinn is a staff writer with a bachelor's degree in English and a minor in Creative Writing. She covers news and lifestyle topics that focus on justice in the workplace, personal relationships, parenting debates, and the human experience.
