Photo: @christywho_/TikTok
Some say it's fine because they're not related, others see heaps of red flags.
By John Sundholm — Written on Mar 01, 2023
There are all kinds of unconventional family structures and all sorts of unlikely ways that partners meet and end up together.
For instance, my family once knew a pair of twins who married another set of twins.
Quirky, to be sure — it's kind of weird to be your brother's brother and his brother-in-law — but, ultimately, not all that big of a deal.
But there are unlikely pairings, and then there are love scenarios where no technical boundaries — that is, biological ones — have been crossed, but the whole thing definitely seems over a line.
This is one of those scenarios.
A woman on TikTok married her former stepfather.
TikToker @christywho_ has shocked the internet with a video taken at her and her now-husband, formerly stepfather's, Las Vegas wedding.
Christy calls the decision to marry her stepfather "the best decision I've ever made."
The video is light on details and definitely seems intended to shock.
The onscreen text reads, "marrying my stepdad was the best decision I've ever made" over a video of her and her new husband's first kiss as man and wife.
But this is no regular old wedding dress and tuxedo kiss at the altar.
The TikToker is up off the ground in her former stepfather's arms with her legs wrapped around his waist, and they are really going for the kiss, as an officiant and attendees clap and film them in the background.
The TikToker previously posted other glimpses of their wedding in Vegas back in May.
And according to commenters on TikTok, it was Christy's mother — you know, her former stepfather, now husband's, ex-wife(?) — who filmed the video while attending their wedding.
The TikToker and her former stepfather have three children, one of whom is a newborn.
Here again, Christy's videos about her kids often seem designed for maximum shock value.
Over a photo of her and her former stepdad and husband snuggling their newborn in the hospital, Christy wrote in the onscreen text, "When you realize you were the one he wanted to build a family with."
Presumably, this is a reference to her former stepfather not wanting to have kids with her mom.
She added in the video's caption, "we needed each other."
In an alternate version of her wedding post, Christy added that she found out she was pregnant with one of their children on their honeymoon in May of 2022.
It appears the child was born this past December. The couple also has two other children together.
The TikToker is proud of her and her husband's large age gap — he was a full-grown adult when she was just a toddler.
The TikToker seems to enjoy the unsavory ideas her and her husband's relationship conjures in many people's minds.
Onscreen text on a video about their age gap reveals how her "husband says he wishes he met me in high school."
What follows are pictures of her husband and former stepfather in high school, along with photos of her as a toddler, scored to a remix of Olivia Rodrigo's "Drivers License," a song about teenage love and longing.
Comments under the video are full of other women congratulating Christy and each other on the major age gaps in their relationships.
Commenters on TikTok and Twitter find the woman's relationship with her husband and former stepfather disturbing.
The woman's video has generated tons of TikTok stitches and tweets from people left slack-jawed by their relationship.
The situation has reminded many people of filmmaker Woody Allen's notorious marriage to his stepdaughter Soon-Yi Previn, the adopted daughter of musician André Previn and Allen's ex-wife Mia Farrow.
"What in the Woody Allen is going on here," one TikToker wrote.
Allen has been credibly accused of sexual molestation by his wife's sister, Allen's adopted daughter Dylan Farrow.
To others, smaller details in the woman's videos seemed like red flags that might indicate abusive dynamics in the situation.
"Notice how empty that wedding is," a woman on TikTok wrote. "Not a coincidence. he's effectively isolated her from family."
But some people on social media have defended the woman marrying her former stepfather.
Some have taken the wife's side on the basis that the relationship isn't incest.
"Besides the age difference, it's not a big deal," one Twitter user wrote. "It's not her biological father."
But others pointed out the obvious — he was in a paternal position to her when she was just a child, which could mean he groomed her.
As a woman on Twitter put it, "The problem here isn’t incest… [there are] a few problems actually. #1 is grooming."
"It’s someone who knew her as a child. Definitely groomed her," another user added.
Others pointed out the other unavoidable elephant in the room — the unprecedented wave of legislative and media attacks against LGBTQ people, especially transgender people, whom the right-wing routinely and baselessly accuse of grooming and molesting children.
"The press is so intent to paint trans people and drag queens as groomers when this stuff is just straight up posted on social media," one person on Twitter lamented.
But some found Christy's story hard to believe and wondered if it was all an elaborate trick to gain social media clout.
Referring to the "story time" TikTok format in which users will spill the details behind their viral posts, one TikTok user wrote, "there's a reason she ain't done the story time yall."
It's impossible to know the details of people's private lives, of course. Still, it's hard not to hope that this is the case.
Inappropriate boundaries, grooming of children and sexual abuse within families is incredibly common.
If you or someone you know is a victim of sexual abuse or assault, help is available. Contact the Rape Abuse and Incest National Network [RAINN] by phone at 1-800-656-HOPE, or via online chat.
John Sundholm is a news and entertainment writer who covers pop culture, social justice and human interest topics.