Girlfriend Ends Relationship With Boyfriend And Says It's Because Of His Disabled Brother

She isn't his number one priority.

couple arguing relaxingtimestories / TikTok, Pexels via Canva

A woman went to Reddit and opened up about her experience with ending an on-and-off 10-year relationship with the love of her life. Why? Because of her ex-boyfriend’s disabled brother.

The post by user SalinasKS, posted on subreddit r/TrueOffMyChest, recently resurfaced in a TikTok where the account exclusively posts videos from the popular confessional and debate website.

The boyfriend’s brother being the number one priority was established early on in the relationship.

The poster had been with her boyfriend, Daniel, on and off for 10 years since they were in high school. However, since day one, it has been established that her boyfriend’s brother, Peter, was his number one priority.


She discussed his unstable and traumatic childhood and that he had poor relationships with his parents. She explained that Daniel had to take on the responsibility of taking care of his younger brother at an early age.



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She emphasized that she hated being Daniel's second priority and said she didn’t know that was what she was signing up for, even though it had been clearly stated since they began their relationship all those years ago.

The OP said that Daniel was always there for Peter and even missed their first time to be intimate with each other to watch his brother’s middle school play.

The couple broke up for the first time because she was distracting her boyfriend from 'saving his brother's life.'

The poster claimed that Daniel broke up with her because she and her son were distracting him while he was trying to save his brother’s life from drug addiction.

She explained that Peter ended up falling into a toxic relationship with a friend who got him hooked on pain medications. Daniel had to be there for his brother all the time and took on the responsibility to help Peter get clean.


The poster claimed she cut off contact with Daniel for a year because she was angry with him for abandoning her and her child. However, she got back in touch with him because, she said, “he’s good with my son and has good qualities”

Then, the poster's ex-boyfriend's brother got into a car crash.

The OP said that Peter was in a coma for three days after having critical surgery to save his life from a horrific car crash. She was even asked by Daniel to stay by Peter's side to ensure that nothing bad happened to him while Daniel went home to get some sleep.

She then claimed she felt guilty for having impulsive thoughts about Peter dying so that "this would all be over." She often imagined a life where everything was over and they could "learn to heal."

Despite waking up from the coma, Peter was in a vegetative state and there were only two outcomes: he would either get better or he would pass away.


Peter required significant and intense care and Daniel was the only person able to provide it. Daniel even moved out of her home and moved in with his brother to take care of him.

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The OP said she didn't like how Peter was also Daniels' priority and that she never came first in their relationship. She asked Daniel to look into putting Peter into residential care, but this idea turned sour and started "the worst fight" the couple ever had.

Daniel argued that he didn’t want his brother to be around strangers, nor did he want him to receive poor care. The poster argued that she wanted to live with her boyfriend, but nothing was working out and claimed their relationship was probably not salvageable.


The couple ended on bad terms when the poster asked if her ex was going to drop their life plans for his brother. And he said yes.

woman crying over breakup with boyfriendPhoto: RDNE Stock Project / Pexels

TikTok commenters say the poster in the wrong here.

The TikTok comments are flooded with “he set the expectations u didn't understand” and other comments of such nature.

Some commenters said that they’re not good for each other since she's feeling neglected in the relationship, and her feelings are valid, but that she knew from the beginning, and that this dynamic created a messy relationship on both sides.


TikTokers in the comments also mentioned that the OP made her ex-boyfriend out to be the villain, and that the breakup is the best outcome for both of them.

Being neglected in a relationship should never be okay, but open communication and active listening must also be priorities in any relationship. Unfortunately for this couple, neither party was doing the right thing and a breakup seems like the best option at this point.

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Cortney Crowell is a writer and contributor to YourTango from New Jersey who covers entertainment, news, and human interest-based stories.