Photo: @ashleyvtravels / TikTok
A loving father.
By Megan Quinn — Written on Feb 10, 2023
If you’re raising children, you’ve most likely heard of the term “helicopter parenting.” It is defined as parents who pay extremely close attention to their children’s experiences and are heavily involved in every aspect of their life.
Like helicopters, they hover above their children metaphorically and physically, often fearing for their children’s safety.
Some parents and children are critical of so-called “helicopter parents,” arguing that they are overstepping boundaries in their children’s lives and harming them by overseeing their every action.
However, each and every one is us experiences the world differently, and unfortunately for some parents, they have no choice but to be helicopter parents to ensure the safety of their children.
One father broke down in tears as he was explaining his decision to helicopter parent his children.
As a father trying to protect his Black children, he has no choice but to be a helicopter parent.
The loving dad defended his helicopter parenting since it maintains his children’s confidence and ensures their safety.
While watching the reality show “The Parent Test,” a series that follows real-life families who have different styles of parenting, one TikTok user, @ashleyvtravels, was deeply moved by the father’s confession.
She posted a video of the segment to her account, which has since been viewed over 1 million times.
When the show’s host asks one set of parents why they chose to helicopter parent their children and asked what “scares” them so much about the world do so, the father, Hashim’s response was heartbreaking.
“They [the children] trust what we see,” he says.
Hashim explains that raising children in this society as a Black father has proved to be especially challenging due to racism.
During the pandemic, the father shares that he and his children had time to engage in serious conversations about what was transpiring in the world around them, including the death of George Floyd at the hands of police brutality.
It was then more than ever that he became fully aware of the dangerous world his children were growing up in.
Hashim breaks down in tears recalling an incident where he was walking on the sidewalk with his young daughter when a police car approached from down the street. He says that his daughter held his hand tightly as if she was protecting him from suffering the same fate as Floyd.
“I’m raising Black sons. It’s not the same for us,” he reminds his white co-stars.
“You see this super fit, superhuman Black man raising another Black man. You see the love and passion.”
While Hashim admits that he initially disagreed with the helicopter parenting style, recognizing that it can sometimes be hard on a child, he eventually realized that Black helicopter parents especially had to do whatever they could to raise strong human beings in today’s world.
“You have to make a superhuman to endure this world that we’re in,” the emotional father says.
TikTok users were heartbroken by the father’s revelation.
“When he said it isn’t the same for us. I felt that in every inch of my body!” one user commented.
“The constant anxiety and stress- I can’t fathom the strength it takes, the incredible love. The toll it takes… it’s just not right,” another user wrote.
Other Black parents shared their own experiences of having to helicopter parent their children to prepare them as best they could for the world.
“People don’t understand how often these conversations are had at a young age in our community. I used to think my mom was paranoid until I experienced it,” one user shared.
“This is so true. We have to send our children out into the world with almost a huge ego because we know the world will knock it down,” another user revealed.
Others called on other parents and society to improve the world we live in so that no parent would have to experience the pain identical to Hashim’s.
“These other parents should all be asking themselves “what can I do so that this man’s children don’t have to be scared of the world?” one user pointed out.
“This is exactly the conversation we should all be having and those answers are what we should be instilling in our kids and families,” another user wrote.
Every parent has a different approach when it comes to raising their children, whether it is helicopter parenting or not. It is important to recognize the discrimination that some families may experience more than others, as Hashim demonstrates, contributes to the way they parent.
One thing is for certain, which is these parents love their children unconditionally and will take whatever necessary measures possible to build them up for the world.
Megan Quinn is a writer at YourTango who covers entertainment and news, self, love, and relationships.