Why All The Best Men Are On Dating Websites

The good guys are all looking for women in the same place for a reason.

Last updated on Jun 18, 2024

Good guy on dating website Geber86 | Canva

People always say that there are no good men left. Maybe this comes from the idea women should wait for a great man to "happen" to them like they are living in a Disney movie, locked in a tower, and good men only appear by happenstance.

But let's think about dating from the standpoint of a great guy. I am going to assume a great guy is made up of the following qualities (though I am confident there are many more):

  • He isn't a philanderer or womanizer
  • He takes an interest in you beyond your looks
  • He wants to find someone with whom he shares common values and goals
  • He respects women enough not to date those he knows he doesn't see a future with
  • He is considerate of a person's time
  • He's thoughtful
  • He wants to do things the right way and be with a woman of equal quality.

So, where are these guys hanging out in the hope of finding the kinds of women they are looking for? One answer: dating websites. And this isn't me telling you, it's the guys telling me.

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Here's why all the best men are on dating sites:

1. In real life, a good guy doesn't know if you're single

He may find you attractive and look for a ring, but single women might wear rings on their left ring fingers while coupled women often don't. Why would he risk the chance, the rejection? And even for the single ones, are you single and looking to date? They have no idea! In online dating, he knows for certain you are single and looking. There is no guessing game for a guy to decipher.

2. Online, good guys have something to say

When using online dating, they don't have to approach you with a cheesy line. They can create a meaningful conversation with you based on information from your profile.

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3. Good guys are online because they want to know about you

They can at least assume what you tell them is true and therefore they can know something about you. They can know if you're looking for the same things if you have similar interests, and if you live locally.

4. They're tired of games

Good guys aren't interested in playing games. They are men who can make decisions, like the decision to sign up for online dating. They know they are ready to meet someone and aren't afraid to put action behind the thought.

5. While online, men feel safer thinking you don't have to question their intentions

Bars breed bad decisions and good guys know that. They don't want there ever to be a doubt as to what or why they are pursuing you, so even if they are out and find you attractive, good guys will often not approach you for fear of looking slimy.

Guy checks profiles on dating website New Africa via Shutterstock


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6. They don't want to waste their time

Smart men know that randomly approaching women in their daily life in hopes of making a connection is a huge time suck to find the right person. They are more interested in streamlining their search.

7. They are online to get offline

Most men don't enjoy online dating. It's not fun for them to sit behind a computer, and send out lots of emails to get to know women just to meet, rinse and repeat. No, many men go online to find the right woman so they can get offline and never deal with it again. But if you're not online, they won't see you.

If you need more convincing, this article idea was not my own — it came from an echoing message I kept hearing from good guys. Take it from them if you won't take it from me!


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Gina Stewart has a single-minded focus on getting people the dates they want. Her philosophy is dating can be hard, but meeting people shouldn't be.