When A Wife Avoids These 11 Daily Habits, Her Marriage Is Likely In Trouble
alexaSH / Shutterstock While creating personal space and avoiding unnecessary conflict can be healthy for marriages in moments, often providing a fleeting sense of comfort and security for partners, consistently running away from discomfort only cultivates more disconnection and resentment. If a partner is avoiding quality time and pushing off their own concerns to keep the peace, the relationship will never benefit from the healthy conflict resolution skills it takes to keep a relationship going.
So, when a wife avoids certain daily habits, her marriage is likely in trouble. Whether it’s a conflict with her partner or affectionate together in public, these seemingly small things should never be avoided or overlooked. They’re what add meaning to the mundanity of everyday life and provide space for couples to truly connect with each other.
When a wife avoids these 11 daily habits, her marriage is likely in trouble
1. Asking thoughtful questions
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Questions are a part of active listening strategies that make people feel valued and important. As a study published in the Social Neuroscience journal suggests, when we link nonverbal communication strategies to active listening behaviors, such as asking thoughtful questions to the person speaking, it activates the reward center in their brain. They feel safe with us, and often form closer, more meaningful bonds with us in the process.
However, if a wife is hardly listening to her partner and overlooking the importance of simple questions like “How does that make you feel?” or “Can you tell me more about that?”, there’s a chance her marriage is in trouble.
2. Small acts of kindness
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Small acts of kindness are the little things that everyone talks about in the framework of relationships. Whether it’s making their partner's cup of coffee before work or picking up a surprise for them on the way home, it’s these little things that actually make a huge difference in relationship satisfaction and happiness.
So, if a wife is actively avoiding small acts of kindness in her marriage, there’s a chance their relationship is in trouble. Not only is she too caught up in her own turmoil and strain to consider them, but her partner feels less important and noticed amid the chaos of everyday life.
3. Maintaining eye contact
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Even if it seems unnecessary, prolonged eye contact is a powerful communication tool that often bonds people closer together, signals interest and engagement, and adds value to seemingly unimportant conversations and interactions.
So, if a wife is scrolling on her phone when her partner is talking or avoiding eye contact altogether in interactions at home, her marriage is likely in trouble. She may not be verbally expressing her frustration or disconnection, but her eye contact and body language are telling a different story.
4. Checking in with her partner
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While there are definitely certain structures and expectations to a truly successful marriage “check-in,” there doesn’t need to be pressure behind questions like, “How was your day?” It’s these small moments of connection that truly make the most difference in long-term happiness for couples, even if they seem dull and mundane.
Marriage experts even suggest that healthy couples have a “magic ratio” when it comes to communication. Even in times of turmoil or disconnection, for every single “negative” interaction they have, there are 5 more positive ones to make up for it. So, if a wife is avoiding these conversations or overlooking the importance of a daily check-in, chances are she’s missing out on closeness and throwing that balance out of harmony.
5. Talking about the future
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If a wife is avidly avoiding conversations about the future with her husband or planning for their life together in passing moments, her marriage is likely in trouble. Even if it seems like a logistical hiccup, the truth is that these conversations are what give couples hope and build a strong foundation for getting through the hardest, most stressful parts of daily life.
So, don’t overlook these conversations. Lean into the discomfort. Work through problems and emotions as they come up. Don’t avoid what seems impossible or difficult to address.
6. Initiating physical touch
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Partners who regularly initiate and engage in physical touch boast higher relationship satisfaction, closeness, and happiness, according to a study published in the Scientific Reports journal. While couples may fall into a routine of schedules and roles, if a wife is initiating physical touch, it ensures that their partner feels valued and wanted in return.
So, if a wife consistently avoids this physical touch and ignores the space to initiate it with her partner, her marriage is in trouble. Not only is it likely a sign of disconnection and resentment, but it’s also only a matter of time before her partner starts to feel unimportant.
7. Going to bed at the same time as her partner
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A study published in the Journal of Sleep Research found that couples who share bedtime routines and go to bed at the same time every night don’t just have better sleep quality and rest, but they’re also more connected and satisfied in their relationship.
Even if it only opens up time to cuddle before bed or have an emotional check-in before falling asleep, it’s these small habits that actually make all the difference in a long-term relationship, especially when life feels stressful and chaotic. So, if a wife is actively avoiding this quality time, staying up later, or even leaving the house for work at different times to avoid the shared routine, that’s a sign that her marriage is in trouble.
8. Sharing routines together
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From having the same nighttime routine before bed to following the same daily habits to foster closeness, sharing routines with a partner can be more powerful than it seems. When the mundane parts of life and the daily routines become a space for emotional connection and affection, couples transform the longevity and well-being of their relationships and lives.
Even if it’s small conversations throughout the day, it’s these couples who report better relationship satisfaction than their peers who are disconnected in many ways. This is why noticing a wife avoiding these daily habits is a red flag that her entire marriage is in trouble.
9. Resolving conflicts in the moment
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Instead of addressing disagreements and conflict in the moment, wives who are stuck in survival mode, trying to cope with disconnection or emotional turmoil, may grow avoidant. They avoid quality time to protect their comfort and walk away from conversations rather than practice conflict resolution.
On top of letting conflicts linger and build into resentment over time, people who regularly rely on avoidance for dealing with any kind of life stress often throw themselves into a spiral of chronic stress and depressive symptoms, at least according to a study published in the Journal of Consulting and Clinical Psychology. So, if a wife avoids these daily habits often, her marriage is likely in trouble, along with her general well-being and mental health.
10. Showing affection in public
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According to a study published in the PLOS One journal, public displays of affection in a marriage are often associated with higher relationship well-being and satisfaction. Even if it’s just holding hands in the grocery store or hugging a partner when they’re around friends, it’s these small moments of connection that bond partners closer together over time.
So, if a woman is keeping her distance from a partner in public and actively avoiding “PDA” when they’re around other people, there’s a chance her marriage is in trouble.
11. Expressing emotions honestly
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Part of the reason why men need relationships with women more than their female partners, at least according to therapist Charlie Huntington, is that they often provide a safe, emotional space to express vulnerability. Compared to women, men have less space for vulnerability in their other platonic relationships, which places a strong expectation on their partners to help them open up.
Especially considering vulnerability is such a strong pillar of healthy relationships, it’s necessary to keep connections strong and long-lasting. So, when a wife avoids these daily habits, whether it’s expressing her own emotions with honesty or creating space for her husband to do the same, her marriage is likely in trouble.
Zayda Slabbekoorn is a senior editorial strategist with a bachelor’s degree in social relations & policy and gender studies who focuses on psychology, relationships, self-help, and human interest stories.
