You're Overthinking This: 3 Ways To Know He Likes You For Sure

If you're not sure about his sincerity, try this.

Last updated on Apr 15, 2023

couple hugging in sunflower field MandriaPix / Shutterstock

Trying to figure out if someone likes you can be frustrating.

Sure, it can be fun trying to analyze what someone feels about you. Does he like you? Does he not like you? 

It is potentially one of the most enjoyable parts of falling in love in its own frustrating and complicated way. 

ut overanalyzing the situation or his every movement, statement, or omission isn't going to help you know how he feels.


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Here are three ways to know he likes you for sure:

1. Take an objective approach: how does he treat you?

As a self-protection mechanism, a lot of people get in the habit of setting their hopes low.


You see, most people’s brains operate like a finely tuned BS machine. Whenever there are any blanks that need to be filled in, their brain will fill in the spaces with some negative BS assumption.

For example, maybe he leaves quickly after a group meeting without talking to you the way he did in the past. Why did he do that? Your BS machine will probably tell you something like maybe he doesn’t like you anymore and he was rushing out to avoid talking to you.

It’s important to note that these thoughts are completely made up and have no foundation in reality, no matter how real they seem to you. The first step in figuring out if he likes you is to turn off the BS machine and just look at objective facts without adding your own spin on them.

So, back to the example, all you would notice is that he got up and left after a meeting. That’s it. There is no meaning applied to it. It’s simply objective behavior.


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2. Pay attention to his actions

Once you're looking at objective actions without your own story applied to them, look only at his actions.

Don’t pay any attention to the words he uses or says. This includes things about how he likes you or doesn’t like you and things about how the two of you are “just friends” or anything else. Simply look at his actions and body language alone.

Are these the sorts of things that someone who likes you would actually do? Are they things that someone who doesn’t like you would do? Does he respect you? Does he only see you as a friend?


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3. Go with your gut

After you’ve turned off the BS machine and paid attention to his actions, go with your gut instinct. Without thinking, do you believe that he likes you?

Your intuition is way more accurate than most people give it credit for. People tend to silence their intuition by overthinking and overanalyzing. But we’ve already turned down the volume on those. Now all that's left to do is follow your intuition.


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Clay Andrews is a relationship coach and founder of Attract the One. He specializes in helping people repair, save and build relationships.