15 Low-Key Things People Keep Doing When Their Heart’s Still With Their Ex

The quiet signs a person hasn't let go of a past relationship.

Last updated on May 09, 2025

Woman's heart is still on their ex. SHVETS production | Canva
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In another life, I would be your girl
We keep all our promises, be it against the world
In another life, I would make you stay
So I don’t have to say you were the one that got away
The one that got away

Do you think Katy Perry wrote these lyrics specifically for you? If yes, then it might be that you are still into your ex. Forgetting about that love is still hard for you. Studies have found that it takes, on average, about 4.18 years to reach the halfway point of dissolving the emotional bond with an ex.

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Here are the low-key things people keep doing when their heart’s still with their ex:

1. They still think about what-ifs

They think about the what-ifs and whatnots. They evaluate their worth and what they could have done right or wrong that did not lead to the break-up.

RELATED: 13 Ways Men Accidentally Show They’re Not Over Their Ex Yet

2. They stalk their ex's social media accounts often

woman whose heart is still with her ex stalking their social media Yuri A / Shutterstock

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The easiest way to know whether they're missing them or not, or, for that matter, if somebody else is missing them or not, is to stalk their social media accounts. 

3. They regret losing their true love

They regret losing them. They go back in time all the time and regret the times they rebuked them or agreed to break up with them.

4. They compare their ex with other people

Inadvertently, they end up comparing them with every other person. Nobody can match their obsession with Xbox. For them, they make the best cheese sandwich in the whole world. They feel nobody is good enough besides them.

5. They have meaningless intimacy

To channel their inner anger and frustrations, they take shelter in the form of meaningless intimacy. Later, again they berate themself for letting someone else touch them in places where they yearn to be touched by their ex.

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Some studies suggest this behavior can be linked to unresolved emotions and a desire to avoid facing complicated feelings. It can be a form of rebound behavior where individuals seek temporary comfort or distraction from the pain of a breakup.

RELATED: 10 Signs He Still Loves His Ex & Is Only Using You To Get Over Her

6. They can't stop overthinking

Yes, they think and overthink the good, bad, and ugly times in their head again and again. They nitpick everything their ex did. Not only that they try to justify their every action in their head.

7. They find reasons to contact them

It does not matter how silly or big the occasion is. It may be their best friend’s birthday or the bad omelet they had for their breakfast, they try to contact them for the silliest reason.

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8. They go back to the happy times

For them, their ex is the most important milestone in their life. What better way to celebrate their life than reminiscing about the happy times they have had — the cuddles, intimacy, the stares, they go back to every happy time.

9. They have a hard time coming to terms with rejection

They still cannot come to terms with why they broke up with them. They question themself all the time. Their ex is such a sensitive topic for them that their parents and friends hesitate to bring their name or an instance about their ex in front of them.

10. They have no plans

They do not know what lies ahead in their future. They just cannot see themself kissing someone else or walking the aisle for another person.

One study argues that lingering emotions and memories from a past relationship can make envisioning or committing to a new future difficult. This hesitation can manifest in various ways, including difficulty making plans or feeling emotionally attached to the past.

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RELATED: The Sentence That Finally Ended 23 Years Of Pining Over My Ex

11. They still talk about them

woman whose heart is still with ehr ex talking about them Krakenimages.com / Shutterstock

Their ex is invariably a part of their conversation. They are not present in their life anymore. But they keep bringing them back in their conversations with their friends.

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12. They stay in contact with their ex's friends and family

They cannot get over the fact that their ex has moved on from them. So, they try and invent ways to keep tabs on them. 

It kills them not to know what they are doing at present. They are still in contact with their best friend or sister to get scoops on their life. They want to know, “Do they miss them?” They want to know about the new person they are dating. They try to gauge how serious they are.

13. They still have hope of reconciling

The most obvious sign that someone is still not over their ex is that they still have hopes of patching things up with their ex.

14. They've lost confidence

They still have not recovered from their bitter breakup. It has taken a toll on their confidence.

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15. They don't find anybody 'good enough' to date

Their ex is so deeply embedded in their blood that they find anybody dateable at all. Nobody is good enough for them to date.

Breakups are messy and moving on is difficult. But life goes on. Try to move on from the one that got away. Because the best is awaiting.

People may subconsciously compare new potential partners to their ex, often idealizing the ex or making their ex seem like the 'perfect partner.' According to a 2021 study, being open to new relationships can make it challenging.

RELATED: The Painful Ways I Finally Got Over An Ex I Missed Like Crazy — 'It Felt Impossible'

The Minds Journal is a platform that brings together writers and readers from across the world to share thoughts that promote self-development.

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