Love

5 Secrets Women Use To Get Men To Propose

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I have received 16 marriage proposals. I've heard them all and I can see it coming a long way off.

If you want to get married soon, please learn these secrets. This system really works.

One of the men who proposed to me said, "Getting married is like a virus and men get it every few years."

Why is that interesting to you? Because the summer we dated, he did not propose but six months after we stopped seeing each other, he called me out of the blue, invited me to "our restaurant", picked me up in a limo, and asked me to marry him.

Women who are focused on marriage get married. Women who are available for fun and games get that.

Here's the thing about finding a husband — you can't force it. Do not use the ideas below as threats, and never ever give a man an ultimatum.

If you threaten "either you marry me or I’m leaving," a smart man will always choose the out. And that leaves you back where you started, looking for a great husband

RELATED: 10 Things Women Notice When Choosing The Guy They're Going To Marry

Here are five secrets women use to get men to propose:

1. Don’t settle for a jerk

You are in charge of your life. Make it happen the way you want by picking the very best man from the millions who are available — yes, millions.

RELATED: 15 Qualities Of A Good Husband That Make A Man A Great Spouse

2. Don't waste your time (or his)

If you want children, you cannot afford to marry a cute, underemployed guy who drinks too much. Can you? Then you can’t afford to date him, either.

3. Be clear about what you want

Your clarity about the exact type of man you are seeking is the fast track to a fast proposal.

I advise my clients to create a list of 50-100 attributes, all written in positive and specific language.

RELATED: 11 Mistakes Women Make That Destroy Their Chances Of Finding A Good Man

4. Don't try to change him

If you’re trying to change him, he would be an idiot to propose to you.

There are millions and millions of candidates for you. Limit your renovations to your starter house and avoid all "fixer-upper" men

5. Keep to this schedule

The rule of thumb is six months for dating, one year to become engaged and move in together, and 18 months for marriage.

That’s the schedule.

You can make your own, but follow it! If he is too confused to proceed at your pace, he’s too confused to become your husband.

If you’re saying to yourself that this is too harsh, you may be waiting for a proposal. If you think this is too direct and insufficiently romantic, you’re right.

Romance is a part of lifelong marriage and you need a husband who is a planner and a lover and an earner, too. Because marriage, life, and children are very, very expensive.

And your time is beyond valuable.

RELATED: Do Not Marry Someone Until You Can Honestly Answer These 20 Qs

Susan Allan is a certified mediator and coach and the founder of the Marriage Forum, Inc. 

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