If A Person Has These 15 Qualities, Psychology Says They're One Of The Rare Ones
Only a small handful of people embody these rare traits.
Lina Verovaya | Unsplash Dating and relationships can be tough, especially in today's world, where finding the right person seems harder than it ever has before. This is why we sometimes tend to "settle" for a relationship.
Self-esteem issues and social insecurity can cause us to settle. Sometimes we just want to have a relationship, either because it seems like everyone else is in one or because we're tired of waiting to have a relationship. So, we settle.
However, many of us may not realize just how toxic settling is — because sometimes you may not know that you're even doing it. So, how can you tell if you've settled or if you've found a rare gem? How do you know if you're getting what you need and deserve out of a relationship?
If a person has these 15 qualities, psychology says they're one of the rare ones:
1. They consider you
Someone who isn’t only holding your hand while you are walking together or is making sure you’re on the safe side of the sidewalk — that isn't someone you should settle for.
Instead, find someone who considers the little things and shows you how much they appreciate you. Find someone whose hand you can feel while he or she walks with you through life.
2. They make you feel loved
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Someone who kisses you because they can’t live without your touch. Someone who pulls you in close when you lie together. Someone who loves feeling your breath in their face while sleeping, or doesn’t mind the fact that you’ve made their arm dead.
This person stays awake because there’s something beautiful about you asleep, and he doesn’t want to wake you.
3. They bring you into their circle
Somebody who would proudly introduce you to their loved ones and would be prouder to tell them that he or she loves you. Someone who makes you feel appreciated and shows it to their family and friends.
Stay single until you meet a person who introduces you to their family as their loved one. Because that’s what you are. And, most importantly, they should be someone who would always stay by your side, whether their loved ones like you or not.
A partner introducing you to their inner circle indicates they are serious about the relationship and want you to be a part of their life. One study also noted that meeting a partner's friends can offer valuable insights into their lifestyle, values, and social habits, helping to determine compatibility.
4. They cherish their time with you
Find someone who would be glad to come to see you, even for a few moments, and would do everything to be in your company, no matter where and how.
When someone truly values you, the time you share isn't just another block on their calendar; it's the highlight of their day.
5. They treat you with respect and kindness
Don’t settle for less than a person who is always going to text you back. Someone who isn’t afraid to pick up the phone and call you, even if you’ve fought. Someone who will plan their future with you and isn’t intimidated by a serious relationship.
Don’t settle for less than someone who knows they would never take advantage of your feelings.
6. They are reliable
A rare person would never play games or mess with your head and heart, because this is childish and shows insecurity. Someone who understands what they have to offer is pure love, deprived of selfishness and personal interests.
Don't choose to be with a partner who isn't honest and who doesn't keep their word. Knowing you can rely on your partner for emotional support and responsiveness creates a feeling of safety and security within the relationship. Research has concluded that this security allows individuals to be more open and vulnerable, fostering deeper intimacy and emotional connection.
7. They give you confidence
A person who appreciates both your looks and your soul. A person who always makes you feel safe, desired, and loved.
Settle for someone who uses the word beautiful instead of hot. A person who tells you sincerely the bad and the good things about you, but also tells you they love you no matter what.
Find someone who understands the meaning of the phrase: "For better and for worse." Someone who won't cast you aside for your physical appearance and instead lifts you and makes you a better person.
8. They are committed to you
Someone responsible enough to maintain a serious relationship. Someone who has a plan and sees a future for you, too. A person who is mature enough for a long-lasting and serious relationship.
Someone like that is worth waiting for, instead of settling for someone who plays games and makes you doubt your connection with them.
9. They will fight for you
Stay with someone who realizes that after you become a couple, you need to walk a long way together. Someone who would do all they could to keep you by their side.
Stay with a person who doesn’t want to lose you. A person who is ready to fight for you. Someone who proves to you that they are prepared to put much effort into your relationship to make it work.
Research has consistently shown that couples who actively use maintenance strategies experience higher intimacy and commitment. These behaviors are not one-time events, but ongoing actions.
10. They keep the spark alive
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Someone who sends shivers from your head to your toes just by putting his hand on your body. A person who makes you smile every time you see their face.
Someone who is passionate about you and keeps the flame in your relationship burning. That is exactly the kind of person you should settle for.
11. They are sure of their feelings for you
Stay with a person who says "I love you" first just because he wants you to know. And someone who would never change their mind about how they feel for you, for whatever reason.
Be with someone who makes it a point to let you know every single day that they love you, appreciate you, and would do anything for you.
12. They add genuine joy to your life
The person you think of when love songs come on. A person who makes you turn the radio up a little louder to hear the words.
Stay single until you meet someone who is your best friend. Wait for the person who makes you feel butterflies when you hear their name, see them pop up on your phone, or who makes you melt when they greet you.
A romantic relationship can have a profound positive impact on one's happiness and overall well-being by providing emotional support, enhancing self-esteem, fostering a sense of purpose, and reducing stress. However, research does stress that personal happiness and the ability to find contentment within oneself remain important factors in creating and maintaining a healthy and satisfying partnership.
13. They admit when they are wrong
Someone who knows when and how to say they are sorry. A person who is not proud and stubborn. A person who would be happy to both apologize for their mistakes and accept your apologies as well, because they know nobody is perfect.
The right person for you won't throw away your relationship just because of a disagreement. Instead, they will see those arguments through and allow you both to learn from them.
14. They listen to you and value your opinion
Someone who values your opinion, even if he or she has an opposite view about the situation. Someone who wants to know how your day is going, who wants to hear what you have to say, instead of complaining that you talk too much. Instead of telling you that you are too sensitive, or too dramatic, or too much.
Wait for the person who wants to hear what you have to say, whether it's about your monotonous work day, a funny anecdote, or a story you've told many times before.
15. They are worth the effort, the energy, and the time
Don’t waste your years on someone who only needs you when they are lonely or have no serious intentions. Don’t bother with people who act like the effort you’re putting in makes you desperate.
Wait until you meet the right kind of partner, who loves you honestly and sincerely and wants to stay in your life forever.
Maria Hakki is a writer, English teacher, and translator who covers relationships and lifestyle topics. Her work has been featured in I Heart Intelligence, Australian National Review, and more.
