Men Who Consistently Do These 11 Things Rarely Make Stable Partners
Connect Images - Curated / Shutterstock Finding love is a complicated task. If someone values stability above all else, it can be made more difficult. Not every man is willing to provide consistency for their partners. Once you can spot the behavior that gives it away, you will be able to avoid these men at every turn.
Stability in a relationship comes with commitment. Both partners promise each other they will be there for them no matter what. Through the ups and downs, each person will put in the effort needed to keep the relationship afloat. With stability comes security. You know you can always trust this person. If a man refuses to commit or keep your trust, these are clear signs that they are rarely a stable partner.
Men who consistently do these 11 things rarely make stable partners
1. They rarely take accountability
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If you date men, you have likely encountered a man who refuses to take accountability for his actions. While it’s hard to admit when we are wrong, we have to maintain healthy relationships. Making a genuine apology shows that you care about someone. If a man refuses to take accountability for his actions, he is unlikely to give you the stability you are looking for. It’s a sign that he will not give his all to a relationship.
Taking accountability is essential for healthy relationships. You will be unable to build a stable relationship with someone who can’t set aside their pride and genuinely apologize.
2. They refuse to commit
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Some guys want to play the field. They do not have the desire to settle down with one person. If a man refuses to commit to you, they rarely make for stable partners. They are likely too self-centered to provide a stable environment for another person. It’s a red flag.
There are many reasons why a man may be fearful of commitment. He may be afraid to lose his freedom, or may feel he will be too smothered in a committed relationship. Whatever the reason, it is clear he is unable to provide stability.
3. They struggle with communication
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When you think of a stable relationship, you likely imagine strong communication between the two people. Communication is one of the most important tools in a healthy relationship. It’s not always easy, but if both partners put in work, it makes a difference. However, if a man struggles to open up and have meaningful conversations, he’s unlikely to be a stable partner. You will often find yourself wondering where he stands.
Communication in relationships can be scary. We may struggle to have complicated conversations. However, it’s important to be open in our relationships. If a man can’t follow through, being in a relationship with him may not be easy.
4. They do not understand their emotions
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Men can struggle to put their emotions into words. It can be a common occurrence. When they struggle to describe their emotions, they may be unstable partners. You may not know where they stand. They could be going through something serious like depression, or they may be losing feelings and refusing to say it. Whatever the reason is, not knowing where a man is emotionally can make relationships complicated.
Society has taught men from a young age that they are not to share their true emotions with the world. If they do, they’ll appear weak. This may be why they lack a deep understanding of their emotions, and they can be poor partners as a result.
5. He doesn’t plan for the future
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When you are in a relationship, your lives come together. Each person brings their own ambitions to the partnership. If a man doesn’t have clear goals for the future, he may not be a stable partner. It could be a sign that he lacks the drive to grow. This not only makes their lives stagnant, but it does the same for your relationship.
If you have big dreams for the future, a man who doesn’t share your vision can bring you down. He may not imagine you in his future. This can lead to a rocky relationship.
6. He lets his ego take control
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The male ego can get in the way of a healthy relationship. When a guy puts himself ahead of others, it’s clear he won’t make for a stable partner. An ego can prevent him from apologizing or taking action in a relationship. He may care more about how people view him than he does about his own relationship. This isn’t an easy situation to be in with a partner.
“Learning how to deal with the male ego can be crucial to having and maintaining a healthy relationship. This means understanding how it evolved for the man or men in your life and how to help them reframe how they measure their own value,” says Kurt Smith, PsyD, LMFT, LPCC, AFC, for Psych Central.
7. He takes advantage of others
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Some men may do anything they can to get to the top. They do not mind taking others down with them. Whatever they need to do to advance, they will. Taking advantage of others shows that they may not be able to have a healthy, stable relationship. They likely prioritize themselves over everyone else. This could cause serious relationship issues.
Taking advantage of others can be a sign that he may take you for granted. If he wants something, he likely has no problem getting it from you and refusing to do much for you in return. It’s a sign that they are selfish and unable to provide stability for someone else.
8. He lacks consistency
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To have a stable relationship with someone, they need to be consistent. Whether it’s being there for you through thick and thin or following up on a commitment they made, they must show up honestly in a relationship. When you can’t rely on someone to provide consistency, it’s clear that they will not be a very stable partner. He may expect you to provide him with stability, but fail to do the same for you. Consistency may only matter when it benefits him.
If he fails to provide consistent support, it’s clear you are in a one-sided relationship. He may have no intention of providing you with stability moving forward.
9. He breaks your trust
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Most of us have been in a relationship that ended with infidelity. It can be heartbreaking to be unable to trust someone we thought loved us. We never expect someone we love to betray our trust, but it happens more often than we’d like. If someone is constantly breaking your trust, they are not going to be a stable partner. Whether they are seeing other people behind your back or continuing to break promises, you will not be able to trust them.
This can trigger trust issues. “Chronic distrust can affect how you view yourself and all the relationships in your life. You might find you frequently doubt other people will come through on their obligations, for example, or you may be afraid of getting too close to others or feel suspicious when someone is kind to you,” says Hope Gillette for Psych Central.
10. He disrespects boundaries
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The easiest way to avoid being taken advantage of is by enforcing boundaries. It can be easier said than done. When we love someone, we may want to do anything we can for them. This is true even if it means exhausting ourselves in the process. If you set boundaries with a man and he continues to disrespect them, it is a sign that he will rarely make a stable partner.
A man who ignores your boundaries will not take no for an answer. They are constantly trying to push your buttons and see what they can get away with. It’s a sign of clear disrespect, and a relationship that isn’t worth pursuing, especially if you are seeking stability.
11. He fears emotional intimacy
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Men can struggle with emotional intimacy. They may have a hard time showing their true selves in relationships. Getting close to someone is scary. Putting our guard down and being truly honest with them can be intimidating. However, it’s important in romantic relationships. A man who keeps himself closed off to a partner is likely to provide instability. You may not know the real him because he is afraid to share it.
If they refuse to let their guard down with you, it can be for a deeper, underlying reason. They may be afraid of abandonment or rejection. If they feel this way, they may be one foot out of the door at all times. It can put strain on your relationship.
Haley Van Horn is a freelance writer with a master’s degree in Humanities, living in Los Angeles. Her focus includes entertainment and lifestyle stories.
