Love

How To Tell If A Girl Likes You ... And What To Do About It

Photo: Dean Drobot / Shutterstock
guy and girl sitting on hay stack smiling and winking at the camera

If you like a woman but can't figure out how to tell if she likes you back, don't panic!

If you pay attention, there are some really simple signs you can pick up on that will be a good indicator of whether or not a girl likes you.

Of course, the only way to know for sure if a girl likes you is to be direct and ask her.

But attraction is a strong force, and if you're wondering if you should ask her out and are worried you'll be rejected, there are ways to figure out if she's really is also thinking that she wants to be more than "just friends."

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A woman is interested in a man who knows what he wants and goes to get it. By noticing knowing how to respond to her, you'll definitely get some points in attractiveness.

If you don't notice her or lack confidence in capturing her attention, she'll eventually lose interest and you'll miss out.

How to tell if a girl likes you

If a woman likes you as more than friends, she'll put extra time and effort into seeing you. If she's not into you, then she will not put so much effort into seeing you, but will want to hang out with you among other friends, rather than one-on-one.

If you are her bestie, she may confide in you about other men in order to get your opinion: a clear sign you are in the friend zone.

If she sees you as a friend, she may be open and not really care what you think. Whereas, if she's into you, the chances are that she's trying to impress you, look her best, and flirt with you.

A clear sign that she's interested in you is when she gives you a taste of what's to come in order to tempt you and entice you to become interested in her. Her aim is to get you to you pick up her cues and signals that she's interested in you, so you can ask her out. So men, it’s your job to read the signals and act. Otherwise, you may miss your chance.

She may not directly tell you that she likes you, but she will plant the seed by being sensual, flirty, and showing an interest in you. She is encouraging you to make the first move. Therefore, pay attention to her signals and cues as an invitation for you to ask her out.

If she’s interested in more than friendship, she will smile, gaze passionately into your eyes, and mimic your body language. She does this to give you the thumbs up to go for it. She wants to be chased and pursued by a man who wants her.

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10 Signs a girl likes you

1. She flirts with you by gazing into your eyes.

She flutters her eyelashes at you with a smile, while mimicking your body language to show rapport.

2. She makes an effort to spend quality one-on-one time with you.

Have you noticed that whenever you're around each other, she tries to find a way to get alone time with you? She wants to be near you, spend time with you, and show her interest, even if it seems subtle.

3. She blushes, stares, and looks away from you.

While she wants to be around you, she also gets excited and flustered because of her romantic feelings about you.​

4. She asks you questions.

This is a way of showing that she wants to know you more and is interested in you!

5. She gets excited and nervous around you.

She might even jittery in case she says the wrong thing, because she doesn't want to be awkward or say the wrong thing.

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6. She is self-conscious about how she looks.

She's trying hard to impress you. This one's a no-brainer — she wants you to think she's attractive!

7. She goes out of her way to dress up for you.

She's putting in more effort than she usually would because she wants to tempt you with her appearance.

8. She hangs on your every word.

You might notice that she pays very close attention to everything you say and what kind of body language you you respond to her, because she's trying to see if you are interested.

9. She responds quickly whenever you call or text.

If she has chemistry with you, being contact and having conversations, whether on the phone or over text, will feel effortless. So when you call or text her, she will want to pick up or reply right away.

When you have chemistry with someone, you'll both notice that the connection will be undeniable. Conversations with each other come easily and time you spend together, even after it's been several hours, may seem like mere minutes.

10. She drops hints about grabbing a meal together.

If she’s interested in being more than friends, she wants to know that you are starting to fall for her, and she's testing the waters to see if you'll pick up on her signals to ask her out to lunch or dinner.

If she’s really into you, the signs will be more obvious, saying things like: “Do you want to come back to my place? (pause) I shouldn’t say that, should I?”

She may tease you, and take it back, showing you her desire is high, but she has to contain it because she doesn’t want it to end in a one-night stand. She wants to keep you holding on for more.

She may also want to hold out for sex a little longer, but will want you to keep putting effort into getting to the next base.

She will put the goalpost closer toward you, so you can make your mark. Then she knows you deserve the final prize.

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Things that might make her lose interest even if she likes you

1. Waiting for her to make the first move.

If she has to make the first move, she may be not convinced you are into her. She will show less interest, because it is too risky for her to put herself out there and get no response, and any interest will probably fizzle out.

If you don't pick up on her signals to you that she’s interested, she may not be convinced that you're worth chasing. She'll stop putting effort in and quickly lose interest, and, chances are, she'll find someone else to pursue.

Likewise, if you let things move into the friend zone, she will treat you no differently from her friends.

She won't want to be taken out for a date, because she won’t want to string you along or hurt your feelings. She might make excuses not to catch up, like constantly telling you that she’s busy.

2. Making her chase you.

She will likely lose interest if you ignore her signals. If she feels rejected, she’ll stop giving the cues altogether and you might just lose her, period.

3. Coming on too fast.

If you come on too fast, you will lose her interest. She wants the space to get to know you.

She will be disinterested if you make advances before any real connection is formed: this will tell her that you are only into one thing.

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What to do if you think you’re both interested

Bottom line, she will show an interest in you if she’s keen to arrange another meetup. She will respond to your calls and texts promptly and prioritize time with you

If she’s interested in you, she will prioritize time spent together with you. She wants to get to know you, find out if you're compatible, and see what potential future prospects might be if you two linked up with each other.

She will also check to see if you are also putting effort in and reciprocating her advances by laughing at her jokes, mirroring her gaze, and flirting back.

If her signals are not matched with responsive behavior that demonstrates a level of commitment to meeting her halfway, she will lose interest because she will think you aren't interested in her. She wants to know that you want her — not in a desperate way, but in the sense that he will do whatever he can to be with her.

Read the signals she's putting out. If she's attracted to you, you will likely have a feeling about it. Once you do, do something about it.

If she’s not interested in you, she won't go out of her way to see you or impress you.

Sure, you might see her dressed up — after brunch with the girls somewhere fancy or if you see her right before she has a date ... with someone else. Otherwise, sweats and a baseball cap are about as much effort she feels the need to put into her appearance when she knows you'll be hanging out together.

And because the best way to know for sure is to find out directly, go ahead already ask her out so that she can be sure you're interested in dating her!

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Nancy Carbone is a counselor, psychotherapist, and couples therapist in Melbourne, Australia.

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