Wife Files For Divorce After Her Husband Purposely Tightens All Of The Jar Lids In Their Kitchen

It seems like his actions were far from being only about jar lids.

jars of spices lined up on kitchen shelf m.dipo / Shutterstock

There are a lot of different reasons why a married couple might decide their relationship isn’t going to make it. Some partnerships just aren’t meant to be.

However, most would say that getting divorced over jar lids is pretty rare, if not unheard of. But for one couple, that’s what it all came down to.

A woman decided that she could no longer be married to her husband after he tightened all of the jar lids in their kitchen to the point that she could not open them.

A wife posted on Reddit asking if she was wrong to divorce her husband after he made all of the lids in their kitchen too tight for her to open on purpose.


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“His over-tightening jar lids [have] been an issue since he was just visiting at my house when we were dating,” she explained. “First, it started with just things he used, and then over time, it became every [expletive] glass jar with a metal lid. He’d tighten them so much I couldn’t open them without assistance.”


Her husband made excuses for why he screwed the jar lids on so tight, but it didn’t ring true to her.

“He initially claimed that he did it to ‘keep food fresh,’” she said. “Then the excuse was that it [was] a habit.”

This woman just lived with his lid-tightening as her reality until her neighbor made her realize how abnormal it was.

“So, about a month ago, my husband had a family emergency and had to travel out of state for 10 days,” she shared. “First day he’s gone, I discover a jar I can’t open. I was annoyed and was going to the store to buy new pickles when the neighbor said hi and to let him know if I needed anything while [soon-to-be-ex] is out of town. I said, ‘Wait here,’ and got the jar which he opened.”

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After she asked him to open another jar, the neighbor offered to come in and open all of the jars for her. She gratefully accepted.

“He said, ‘You know this was intentional. It was every jar, and I’m sure he doesn’t regularly use hot pepper paste or mango puree or any of your other fancy cooking stuff,’” she recounted. “Then he held up the two jars he couldn’t open and said, ‘I don’t know why he’s doing it, but it wasn’t an accident.’”

“I couldn’t sleep that night,” she recalled. “Tossed and turned all night. I called out of work. By 10 a.m., I realized that I couldn’t stay married anymore and I made an appointment with a lawyer for the next day.”

Reddit commenters agreed this was more sinister than a man wanting to tighten jars.

The woman’s fellow Redditors agreed that this went beyond a man just wanting to tighten jars to keep food fresh.


“You’re not getting a divorce because of jar lids; you’re getting a divorce because your husband is gaslighting you for sport,” one person argued.

The National Domestic Violence Hotline stated that gaslighting is a form of abuse. “It is an extremely effective form of emotional abuse that causes a victim to question their own feelings, instincts and sanity,” they said. “As a result, the abusive partner has a lot of power (and we know that abuse is about power and control).”


3 warning signs of gaslighting ⚠️

♬ Butterflies (Piano Sonata) - Tony Anderson

By making his wife doubt her reality and her own ability to be logical, this husband is gaslighting her and making her question everything. 


While these jar lids are small, they have become a powerful means to an end. She is doing the right thing by getting as far away from him as possible.

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If you or someone you know is experiencing domestic violence or the threat of domestic violence, call the National Domestic Violence Hotline for help at 1-800-799-SAFE (7233), or go to www.thehotline.org


Mary-Faith Martinez is a writer for YourTango who covers entertainment, news, and human interest topics.