Why I Am Actually Thankful That You Broke My Heart

Heartbreak is a very personal thing.

woman with broken heart kyonntra / Getty Images & Billion Photos via Canva

By Tanzeela Sareea

Heartbreak is such an underrated word used in today’s topic of conversations. The moment you say “they broke my heart,” the instant response you’ll hear is “don’t worry, give it time, everything will be okay, it wasn’t worth it anyway.”

It’s so very easy for someone to say give it time, it will be okay; however, it is really difficult for the person who’s going through the heartbreak to deal with the heartache.


As strong or weak as you may be, mentally and emotionally, dealing with your heart breaking isn’t an easy feat for anyone.

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Heartbreaks can be of various kinds, and there is not a set definition or situation for it.


For some, heartbreak happens after being in a relationship with someone for an extended period of time, but some experience that feeling even if they just really liked the person, or were in that awkward almost dating stage.

Timing doesn’t determine the degree of pain, it’s the intensity of the feelings that do.

Some people are casual during a relationship, so when their heart breaks it’s easier for them to snap out of it, as opposed to someone who gets too serious too early on in a relationship and for them it’s much harder to get over their feelings.

And sometimes, it doesn’t depend on the length of the relationship; no one should be able to say there is a certain amount of time before you can feel heartbreak, or when you should be over it.


Heartbreak is a very personal thing. Getting through a heartbreak is a process. There are many stages, and you may feel sad, angry, empty, incomplete.

But you have to remember that one day, and this day will come, when you realize you miss the habit of being in a relationship, not specifically the person with whom you were involved.

Think about it: you were living a completely happy and satisfied life before this person came into it, and you will live a happy and satisfied life once you’re over this person.

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And even though heartbreak sucks, it’s not all a negative experience! After you have digested what has happened and come to terms with your feelings, it’s then that you will realize that this cloud also came with a silver lining.


This is when you realize the importance of hurting, and how important it is to truly get over someone for good, and how strong that makes us as people.

Heartache is the worst pain I have experienced in life, but I have grown from it. This is the point you realize how much you had ignored about this person that you normally wouldn’t just because you really liked them.

It is with every heartbreak that you realize what your real priorities are and how hard you are willing to work for them. You will realize what aspects/habits/traits of a person you are willing to compromise on and what factors are complete dealbreakers for you.

This is the part where you will realize what kind of person you want in your life, what characteristics in a person are extremely important for you that you’re not willing to compromise on.


You may not realize the importance of figuring that out now, but in the future when the time is right and the person is right, you will be able to make the choice that’s most right for you.

Life is a compilation of experiences, and every time you get up and try again after a fall is what will make your life a fulfilled and satisfied one. Every heartbreak is a new experience, and those experiences are the ones that make you 100% sure of what you want in life and how you want your life to be.

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It will give you a fresh new approach to life that you wouldn’t have known if your life kept moving the way it was with your respective partner. As it is said, the best fruit is always the highest hanging ones, in the same manner we need to be patient, and need to learn from our mistakes, and work on making ourselves a better person in order to reach that perfect fruit.


We get what we deserve, and if this didn’t work out for us, it is because something better is coming our way. We should all go through the process of hurting after a breakup because if we skip that we will never be able to recover fully from it.

You don’t need a relationship to validate your existence. We may not realize it but, subconsciously, a lot of us or all of us feel that way at some or the other point in our life. People come and go, what remains constant is us.

If we have so much love to give to others, who may or may not appreciate it, I believe it is very important that we reserve some of that love for ourselves. Why should we expect someone else to treat us a certain way when we should, in fact, treat ourselves the way we want to be treated?


You are the only constant; make yourself happy, do what is right for you and what you feel is right. Don’t make it someone else’s responsibility to build you up and make you feel better about yourself; do the things that will make you become the best version of yourself.

Take up a hobby, learn something, volunteer, take a trip, or just explore life. It’s too short to be sad over a person.

Somewhere along the way, when the time is right, someone who fits in your life puzzle will come by and this time to stick. It’s at that point in your life you will appreciate your ex for breaking your heart, and giving you the momentum to build a better you.

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Tanzeela Sareea is an entrepreneur and hobbyist writer who focuses on topics of travel, relationships, and psychology.