4 Signs Your Boyfriend Is A Narcissist Who You Should Dump ASAP

Is he a narcissist? Run away. Fast.

Last updated on Apr 23, 2023

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Have you ever wondered, "Am I being emotionally abused?" If so, you may have been missing the signs that your boyfriend is a narcissist who's hurting you. 

When you're dating a narcissist, you may not realize that your relationship is not the best, nor the healthiest. 

The beginning of every relationship is exciting.

But, sometimes, you are so smitten that you lose yourself in a relationship. It is at this time you are more likely going to get caught in a relationship with a narcissist.


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One in 25 people in the U.S. have disorders associated with no conscience, such as Narcissistic Personality Disorder. Furthermore, narcissistic abuse is believed to affect over 158 million people in the U.S.


Dating a narcissist can tear your life apart unless you find the courage to leave. The trouble is that the longer you are in the relationship, your boyfriend will suck the self-confidence out of you.

If you find yourself in one, it is not because you are bad. Someone with a narcissistic personality is often very good at manipulation. He will start taking control of you even when you are not aware of it.

Once you realize you are in a destructive relationship, don’t be afraid to get help. There is no shame in seeking help.

Take this important piece of dating advice to heart: before you enter a new relationship with someone new, it's important to know some of the signs of narcissism and narcissistic traits in order to watch out for them. 


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Here are four signs your boyfriend is a narcissist, and that it's time to leave the relationship:

1. He insists that you do what he wants

You might enjoy a night at the theatre. He will always have an excuse when you ask him to attend. He will likely get mad if you go with someone else. All your friends are a threat to him.

You have expressed a desire to go on a trip. Unfortunately, your boyfriend always comes up with excuses. When he wants to go on a trip, he expects you to go and will get mad if you disagree.

If you are living together, he may at the beginning of the relationship act helpful. But it won’t take long for him to show his true self. It will soon be all about him.


He might go out for a night with his friends but will expect you to stay home because he does not want to lose control of you. He might keep checking up on you to see if you stayed home.

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2. His gifts to you are more about him than you

If you notice that he never pays attention to what you would like for your birthday, anniversary, or Christmas — listen to that loud and clear alarm bell!

At first, you might like his gifts. It might be a beautiful new outfit that you love. But soon you notice that he seems more concerned about showing you off to his friends.

He will be demanding. If you don’t give him what he wants you will pay big time for it with anger and rage. 


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3. Small disagreements turn into significant battles

Any couple is going to have a conflict. Conflict happens when there are two people in a room with different points of view. Conflict only becomes a problem when people emotionally and physically attack each other.

If you are in a relationship with a narcissist, an insignificant conflict will turn into a major battle. It could be something as small as a disagreement over what restaurant you are going to.

Suddenly, he will erupt and start blaming you for all sorts of things that have no relation to your decision about where you are going to eat.


He will pick fights with you. He will find your vulnerable places and use them to humiliate you. He will do everything he can to destroy your self-worth.

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4. He blames you for all the problems in your relationship

No relationship is perfect. But with a narcissist, you are never going to be in a mutual and respectful relationship. You are never going to change his mind. He is never going to love you.

You can try everything you can imagine to work through your conflict. Your boyfriend may try to appease you, but before long, he will try to take control of you through continuous emotional attacks.


Not only will he complain to you, but he will try to put you down in front of your and his friends. Your boyfriend's ongoing abuse is devastating. 

No one is perfect. But, if your partner is not willing to take any responsibility for his behavior, he has no right to blame everything on you

You may be surprised by how many women get caught in these abusive relationships. It is not just mentally unstable women who end up in these hurtful relationships. It can happen to anyone.


Listen to your friends if they are concerned about you. Over a period, a narcissist will keep attacking you until you lose your self-confidence. You will start to believe whatever he says.

The earlier you can get out of a relationship, the better. The longer you stay, the harder it will be to leave.

If you think you can change him, you are deluding yourself. If your partner is to change, he will first need to accept that he has a problem and then be willing to get the help he needs.

In healthy relationships, you have to be able to listen to your intuition and your heart. Start paying attention to your insights that arise from a quiet mind.

You have one chance to live your life. Don’t allow anyone else to destroy it.


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Roland Legge is an author, Certified Spiritual Life Coach, and teacher of the Enneagram. He helps people connect to their inner selves and find alignment with their highest purpose and values.