10 Truly Sad Ways Growing Up As A Teen Was Honestly Never The Same After The 90s
melissamn | Shutterstock From schools to family dynamics to public spaces, being a teenager has never been the same since the 1990s, and these changes show up in the social dilemmas and unique struggles of today's younger generations.
Here are some truly sad ways growing up as a teen was never the same after the 90s:
1. Teens have fewer ways to connect without a screen
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Third places, which are community-centric public areas (think: libraries, public parks, coffee shops) where people can meet others, mingle, and engage in social interaction without financial or cultural barriers, have been slowly deteriorating over the past decade, sparking isolation.
This isolation harms teenagers’ social development and cuts them off from foundational experiences and friendships that shaped older generations’ identities. As these younger generations of teenagers grow up, their social circles and friendships are shaped by relationships formed on a screen, which restricts the benefits of community for most young adults.
2. Teens rarely venture outside alone
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As parental overprotection grows, many teenagers don’t have the freedom to leave home without supervision. From walking to school alone to meeting friends at the mall or hanging out in public without a parent, many teens are forced to live under the watchful eye of the adults in their lives.
While this overprotective tendency might give parents some peace of mind, as a report from the Berkeley Political Review suggests, pushing the anxiety of “stepping back” down the road a few years only shelters kids during the most transformative stage of their lives. They’re less likely to make mistakes in their youth or learn from core experiences that teenagers a few decades ago founded their independence on.
3. Teens struggle more with their mental health
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Primarily driven by the rise of technology, social media, and pandemic-related social consequences, many teenagers today struggle with higher rates of mental illness like depression and anxiety, according to a study from the World Health Organization. While more information about mental illness, including helpful resources for mitigating its consequences, can partially explain this rise in reported struggles, many teenagers are developing toxic coping mechanisms because of this accessibility.
Many teens are also forced into a “comparison culture” on social media where they’re pressured to meet unrealistic expectations about body image, appearance, academic success, emotional intelligence, and even relationships at such a young age
4. Teens have unlimited access to anxiety-inducing news
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Unfortunately, younger generations of Internet-savvy teenagers often have much more exposure to heavy news headlines and worldly issues than their older counterparts at the same age. As a result, they’re often forced to carry fear, especially when they don’t have the resources to cope with this information in a healthy way.
It can be confusing and incredibly disillusioning to log on to social media and watch horrible videos about the world and testimonies from people living through tragedies, only to turn your phone off and try to resume your typical life. While supportive family environments and open communication can help to mitigate this anxiety, at least according to a report from Akron Children’s, most parents aren’t equipped with the right information to start these difficult conversations.
5. Teens rely on technology for community
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From targeted toxic algorithms on social media, pushing inappropriate content on teenagers, to a lack of critical thinking because they most of their news from 15-second TikTOk reels, teens are stuck between a rock and a hard place: they’re yearning for community but are only able to fulfill that need at the expense of their mental health.
6. There's more pressure than ever on teens to excel academically
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According to an investigation by The Harvard Gazette, many teenagers today are developing toxic transactional relationships and struggling with poor self-esteem because of intense academic and achievement pressures. This pressure is driven mainly by parental expectations and educational standards, which have changed significantly over the past three decades.
Many teenagers today are also falling victim to the consequences of school standardization, where standardized tests reward academic achievement and “perfect students” over everything else. Struggling students fall through the cracks, and the uniqueness and talents of students (who are gifted in non-academic ways) are inadvertently ignored.
7. There is more pressure on teens to follow trends thanks to technology
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Because of the consequences of online comparison culture, many teens try to adopt every trend and succeed in all the right ways. They don’t feel like they can be themselves — and many don’t even have the resources or skills to figure out who they are — without succumbing to perfectionism.
Especially as many households struggle with economic insecurity and financial hardship, teenagers also resent their parents for not having the luxury of following these trends, whether it's buying the newest Owala water bottle or an overpriced ticket to the concert everyone at school is bragging about attending.
8. Teens are less empathetic
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Research from the University of Michigan reports that young adults in college are 40% less empathetic today than they were nearly 30 years ago, primarily because of the negative impacts of technology and social isolation. Struggling to learn emotional intelligence and literacy behind a screen, many teenagers today struggle to maintain healthy social connections because they never learned how to empathize with others.
9. Teens struggle with maintaining healthy relationships with their parents
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According to a 2022 study from the journal Developmental Psychology, parenting during the teenage years is hard enough, as parents spend less time with their kids and often become harsher in their discipline because they expect more. Still, modern teens are struggling with this relationship even more than their older peers, leading to unprecedented levels of estrangement between children and their parents later in life.
10. Teens are less prepared for adulthood
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According to a study published in the Child Development Journal, teenagers today grow up much more slowly than their peers in the late 1990s and engage in fewer adult activities, such as working a job and driving. Between 2010 and 2016, only 32% of young adults worked for pay, compared to nearly 64% in the early 1990s.
Zayda Slabbekoorn is a senior editorial strategist with a bachelor's degree in social relations & policy and gender studies, focusing on psychology, relationships, self-help, and human interest stories.
