People Who Are Proper Adults & Refuse To Live In A Pigsty Often Have 8 Things In Their Home
PeopleImages | Shutterstock Part of the transition to real adulthood involves leaving your parents’ home and living on your own, which is both exciting and nerve-wracking. You have to meet your own practical needs, like keeping enough laundry detergent and glass cleaner lying around, while creating a nourishing, peaceful environment that says: Hey Mom & Dad, I'm a real adult now!
People who are proper adults often have these basic things in their home:
1. Shelves filled with books
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According to a research study from 2013, reading fiction impacts how much empathy a person has. The study’s findings support a hypothesis called “transportation theory,” which posits that reading fiction emotionally transports people into the story, which increases their capacity for empathy. So, if your shelves are stacked with books, congratulations! You've graduated to being a proper adult.
2. A well-stocked pantry
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A well-stocked pantry indicates that you pay attention to what you eat. Mealtime is more than standing over the sink and scarfing down a peanut butter and jelly sandwich as you did in college: It’s a time to nourish your body and your soul. It’s highly likely that your parents insisted on eating together as a family, which meant you sat at the table and talked about your day.
As health coach and certified intuitive eating counselor Lisa Newman explains, “There is no doubt that regular family dinners lead to overall healthier eating and can set up your children for lifelong good eating habits.” Research shows that eating dinner as a family is beneficial, and consistent family dinners are linked with higher academic performance and stronger emotional connections between family members.
3. A designated workspace
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It doesn’t have to be fancy or hi-tech or even a separate room, but creating a space that you only use for your job shows that you’re committed to staying organized and being as productive as possible. While working from bed while wearing your robe and slippers is your given right as an adult, it’s not the most conducive place to make a dent in your daily assignments. Sitting at a desk, even if it’s crammed into the corner of your closet, sets you up for success and shows you're a bona fide adult.
4. Family photos
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Whether your photos are carefully pressed into an album or framed and hanging on your walls, keeping old pictures is a clear sign that your family is important to you and you’re proud to carry them with you.
For many people, moving out of their family home marks a hard-drawn line in the sand. They have no interest in holding onto their past, which means they have no need for prom photos or first day of school pictures. They’d rather forget where they came from, which is an essential part of their healing journey. They acquire photos of their chosen family, rather than the family they were born into. Whatever family you acknowledge — god-given or the one you found later in life — is fine, as long as you acknowledge. Your family photos might be sun-bleached, with tattered edges and fingerprint smudges, but that just means your memories are well-loved, and that you're a proper adult now.
5. Sentimental keepsakes
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Saving family heirlooms and tangible reminders of where you came from keeps you connected to your past as you move toward your future. Your family heirlooms could be anything: The pair of shoes you took your first steps in or the candlesticks your grandmother brought across the ocean years before you were born. They might be the postcards your sister sent from camp and the quilt your great-aunt made, the one that gets passed down through generations. Having keepsakes means you value your family history. These objects serve a far deeper purpose than being decorations. They’re something to hold onto as you head out into the real, adult world.
6. Collections that bring you joy
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Maybe your windowsills are lined with succulents and mini cacti because tending to plants makes you feel at peace. Maybe you have stacks of vinyl you found at a thrift store or a gallery of watercolors you painted. Having a hobby is a small, accessible way to stay passionate and let yourself decompress.
Harvard Medical School reports that hobbies are good for our mental health. Taking part in an activity you love can alleviate symptoms of depression and make you happier. Hobbies engage us in ways our jobs don’t. Pulling up weeds in your garden gives you sunshine on your face and gets your hands dirty. Playing in your neighborhood kickball league keeps your body moving and connects you to potential new friends in your community. Collecting magnets from your travels to display on your wall gives you a fun task whenever you go somewhere new. Having a hobby lets people be creative and stay connected to their child-like sense of wonder even as adults.
7. Cookbooks and family recipes
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Figuring out your own routine, away from your family, is a process of trial and error. As years pass, you find your rhythm, which is rooted in how your parents raised you. Cooking from recipes your mother made, and that her mother made, is like casting a magic spell. Cooking at home is a way to feel connected to your family in adulthood. It allows you to make food you love and keep your traditions alive.
8. Laughter
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Life isn’t easy, but finding humor amidst daily hardships is an essential act of self-care, especially when the reality of adulthood sets in. There will always be bills due and pressure at your job and someone you know who’s fallen ill, and after all that, you still have to get dinner on the table.
Being able to laugh at the little things makes the bumps in the road more manageable. Sharing inside jokes with your partner and listening to your kids play pretend reveal that there’s always a way to access joy. A noisy home is a happy home, which shows your parents did a good job raising you into a proper adult who’s content with their life.
Alexandra Blogier, MFA, is a staff writer who covers psychology, social issues, relationships, self-help topics, and human interest stories.
