Parents Who Have A Good Relationship With Their Kids Long After They're Grown Usually Share One Distinct Trait
JLco Julia Amaral | Shutterstock All the books in the world can never prepare someone for the ups and downs of raising a kid. After all, every child and every family is entirely unique.
And while parents are meant to guide their kids and help them develop skills, there's actually one trait that indicates the type of relationship a parent will have with their child once they grow up. This is a skill that ensures a successful parenting journey.
Parents who have a good relationship with their grown children created a childhood full of humor.
According to a 2024 study, people who grew up with funny parents, or parents who used humor in everyday life, have close relationships with them as adults. They also are more likely to feel like their parents did a good job.
Researchers and psychologists from the Public Library of Science and the Penn State College of Medicine explained that humor plays a huge role in successful parenting. They surveyed around 300 people about their experiences of being raised with or without humor and their views on their childhood.
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Around 55% of respondents admitted that humor was a significant part of their childhood, and 72% found humor to be an effective parenting tool. In fact, the vast majority who reported having a strong bond with their parents as kids and now as adults also had humor as a part of their upbringing.
"While parent-child relationships are more loving than business relationships, stressful situations happen a lot when parenting," Lucy Emery, one of the authors of the study, said. "Humor can help diffuse that tension and hierarchy and help both parties feel better about a stressful situation."
Many pediatric specialists and parenting experts have noted that humor also helps a child's development.
"Humor can teach people cognitive flexibility, relieve stress, and promote creative problem solving and resilience," Benjamin Levi, professor of pediatrics and humanities at Penn State College of Medicine and senior author of the study, explained.
According to Children's Minnesota Hospital, instilling a good sense of humor in a child helps them see situations from different perspectives and grasp unconventional ways of thinking. Humor allows kids to laugh at themselves when they make mistakes, as opposed to being angry or disappointed that they messed up.
"Kids with a well-developed sense of humor are happier and more optimistic, have higher self-esteem, and can handle differences (their own and others') well," the hospital said. "Kids who can appreciate and share humor are better liked by their peers and more able to handle the adversities of childhood."
Along with aiding in childhood development, humor and laughter have many other benefits.
There's a reason why people say laughter is the best medicine. Laughing and having a sense of humor not only relieve stress, but boosts self-esteem and social skills.
When children grow up understanding that humor is a good way to approach some situations, they also develop resiliency. It allows them to move forward, and prevents them from putting too much pressure on themselves.
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In addition, when parents lead with humor, it affects how their kids think and feel. As psychology professor Steven Sultanoff said, "Rather than avoiding serious issues, humor... helps families navigate conflict without allowing stress to overwhelm the relationship. Children who feel emotionally connected are generally more willing to cooperate, communicate openly, and recover from conflict."
Of course, humor and laughter don't always provide solutions to problems. The problem a child is having or the intention of a joke are things parents should consider. They should also never use humor to make their child feel small.
Every situation is different, but allowing humor to be important in a household can create a strong parent-child bond. Adult children not only feel safe around their parents, but can take that same feeling and apply it to their own lives.
Nia Tipton is a Chicago-based entertainment, news, and lifestyle writer whose work delves into modern-day issues and experiences.
