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15 Undeniable Warning Signs Your Relationship Is Abusive

Photo: Dmitriy Ilkevich on Unsplash
15 Warning Signs Of An Emotionally Abusive Relationship
Expert
Self, Health And Wellness

If he does any of these things, get out and get help.

No one plans to enter physically or emotionally abusive relationships.

In fact, many survivors of domestic abuse swear to themselves after they've escaped that, now that they know the signs of emotional abuse and potential violence, they'll never enter another abusive relationship again, only to find the cycle repeating itself with the next man.

According to the National Domestic Violence Hotline, "On average, it takes a victim seven times to leave before staying away for good."

It's easy for others to ask why women don't just avoid entering into an abusive relationship in the first place*, but detecting early signs of abuse can be far more difficult and complex than it seems.

The Women's Center, a non-profit organization which provides mental health counseling, support, and education to women, men, families, young adults, and children in Virginia and Washington, DC., distributed a version of the following list of red flag behaviors for women seeking domestic violence counseling to be aware of.

RELATED: 21 Signs You're In An Emotionally Abusive Relationship

A path to a safer, healthier and happier life often starts with a bit of knowledge.

If your partner displays the following behaviors, they may be signs you're in an abusive relationship:

1. He pushes for quick involvement.

He comes on strong, claiming, "I've never felt loved like this before by anyone."

You get pressured for an exclusive commitment almost immediately.

2. He's constantly jealous.

Your partner is excessively possessive, calls constantly, or visits unexpectedly.

3. He's controlling.

He interrogates you intensely about who you talked to and where you were, checks mileage on the car, keeps all the money or asks for receipts, and insists you ask for permission to go anywhere or do anything.

RELATED: 13 Signs Of Emotional Abuse Commonly Misinterpreted As 'Acts Of Love'

4. He has highly unrealistic expectations.

He expects perfection from you and for you to meet his every need.

5. He's isolates you.

He tries to cut you off from family and friends, deprives you of a phone or car, or tries to prevent you from holding a job.

6. He blames others for his own mistakes.

The boss, family, you — it's always someone else's fault if anything goes wrong.

RELATED: 11 Signs Of Emotional Abuse In Relationships — And How Abusers Try Using Them Against You If You Leave

7. He makes everyone else responsible for his feelings.

The abuser says, "You make me angry" instead of "I'm angry," or, "I wouldn't get so pissed off if you wouldn't..."

8. He's hypersensitive.

He's easily insulted and will often rant and rave about injustices that are just part of life.

9. He's cruel to animals and children.

He kills or punishes animals brutally.

He also may expect children to do things beyond their ability or tease them until they cry.

RELATED: I Saved Myself From An Emotionally Abusive Man (And You Can Too)

10. His uses force during sex.

He enjoys throwing you down or holding you down against your will; he finds the idea of rape exciting, not only in fantasy.

He intimidates, manipulates or forces you to engage in unwanted sex acts.

11. He subjects you to verbal abuse.

He constantly criticizes you or says cruel things. He degrades, curses and calls you ugly names.

He will use vulnerable points about your past or current life against you.

12. He insists on rigid gender roles in the relationship.

He expects you to serve, obey and remain at home.

RELATED: 9 Abusive Things Men Do — And Why You Need To Burn That Bridge For Good

13. He has sudden mood swings.

He switches from loving to angry in a matter of minutes.

14. He has a history of battering others.

He admits to hitting women in the past, but states that they or the situation brought it on.

15. He threatens violence.

He makes statements such as, "I'll break your neck," but then dismisses it with, "I really didn't mean it."

*Important note: Though females are the primary victims in Domestic Violence, it is not always the case; males can also be victims of emotional, physical and sexual abuse.

If you or someone you know is in an abusive situation, there are resources available in your state, as well as the 24/7 National Domestic Violence Hotline (1-800-799-7233).

RELATED: 6 Heartbreaking Ways Emotional Abuse Changes You

Wendy Kay is a Life Strategy Coach and author of Mastering the Art of Feeling Good, an inspirational and practical guide on enriching one’s life by learning how to feel good at will.

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