If You Truly Love Them, You CHOOSE Them EVERY. SINGLE. DAY.

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Couple in Love

"Being deeply loved by someone gives you strength, while loving someone deeply gives you courage." — Lao Tzu

As someone who’s always looking to have better relationships and who has become the go-to person for friends looking for a little love advice, it’s only natural that I would write about relationships and most importantly, why we choose certain relationships over others.

I believe in “Once upon a time” and “Happily ever after”, but there’s a whole world between those two moments.


Getting to the happily ever after — and most importantly staying there — is more than pretty Facebook posts or random smiling photos. Let’s face it, when someone points a camera at you, no matter how mad you are about something, you’ll still put on a good smile.

But real love isn't just about presentation — it's about the wonderful commitment that to people make to love, cherish, and always make each other happy.

We choose that person to tell our most intimate thoughts to because they will always be there with us when we’re riding the wave, and they're there to pick us up when we’re washed out on the shore.

While most of us would love to believe that a good relationship will always be smooth sailing, the truth is we’re PEOPLE — flawed, moody, always saying the wrong thing. We hurt each other at times, and we have doubts. But then there are times when the smile of the person you love literally brings tears of joy to your eyes.


They do this tiny little gesture that makes you see them in a new light, and at the end of a long day, they come home and cuddle next to you and make everything better. 

The Buddhist view on relationships is that the love can only be as strong as your commitment. Love is an emotion; it will go up and down, and at times it will depend on whatever else is going on in your physical body. But the commitment to grow in that love is what makes a relationship stronger regardless of the outside circumstances.

Look at the relationships you have in your life right now ... do they make you grow? Do they make you want to be a better person? Do you have a commitment to love and to grow in that love? 

The best relationships are the ones in which you’re choosing to grow in every single day. 


Ones in which the very thought of your partner gives you wings and makes you want to be a better person. It’s where the drama of the day melts away because you know you’ll see that person at the end of it. Roy Croft says, I love you, not only for what you are, but for what I am when I am with you. I love you, not only for what you have made of yourself, but for what you are making of me.” 

If you can grow in your love and grow as a person just by having that person next to you, then you have found your one.

This article was originally published at JustLav. Reprinted with permission from the author.